BRIAN SIBLEY : his blog

BLOGGED & BELOVED

2012-02-01T00:01:00.002Z

It's not often – in fact hardly ever – that one wins Two Awards in One Week, but I am someone who has!

Around the time I was getting that BBC Audio Drama Award, I received a comment on this blog from Wendy of Good Books for Young Souls telling me that she had honoured me with a LIEBSTER BLOG AWARD.

The word 'Liebster' is German for 'beloved' and this award is given by bloggers to bloggers of blogs with fewer than 200 followers in recognition of the fact that their blogs are enjoyed (even 'beloved') and in the hope that this added recognition will lead to their being read and followed by many more people.

The rules are simple: you don't have to accept the award, but if you do, you are asked to thank the blogger who nominated you and nominate five of your own favourite blogs.

Even though I have kept to blogs (as opposed to websites) this wasn't easy because (as you will see from the side-bar on the right) I follow a great many blogs... Anyway, here are five diverse blogs that are well worth a look...

1 Attempted Bloggery

2 Pencil Notes

3 Kevin Kidney

4 Gifts and Dreams

5 It's Always Something...

I hope you enjoy them even a little bit as much as I do...

AND THE WINNER IS...

2012-01-30T00:04:00.008Z

I am thrilled that at last night's inaugural BBC Audio Drama Awards, I picked up the award for Best Adaptation for The History of Titus Groan, my serialisation of Mervyn Peake's 'Gormenghast' novels.

The awards were presented by David Tennant at a ceremony held in the Radio Theatre at Broadcasting House and here I am clutching it, shortly after the event...

Although Titus was unsuccessful the other two categories for which it was nominated (Best Use of Sound in a Audio Drama and Best Supporting Actor for Carl Prekopp who played Steerpike), the citation for the Adaptation Award praised all aspects of the production:

The judges described this as "a brilliant piece of radio drama. It was a hugely ambitious undertaking to adapt the darkly comic, surreal and visual world of Mervyn Peake's novels for sound and this adaptation is faithful to both the spirit and the landscape of the originals.

The almost Dickensian characters (wonderfully realised by an outstanding cast), the exquisite language and a rich and original soundscape works for both Peake aficionados and new listeners."

The award is engraved with a profile of Prospero taken from Eric Gill's famous statue, 'Prospero and Ariel' which has stood above the front doors to Broadcasting House for the past 80 years.

"The isle is full of noises..." and I've just won an award for adding to them!!

Images: BS by David Weeks; 'Prospero and Ariel' from R/DV/RS's Photostream

BIRTHDAY FANCIES

2012-01-27T00:01:00.007Z

Today is the 180th anniversary of the birth of Lewis Carroll on 27 January 1832.

To mark the occasion, here is one of his less-well-known nonsense poems with another of those rediscovered drawings made by my much-younger self...

MY FANCY

I painted her a gushing thing,
With years about a score;
I little thought to find they were
A least a dozen more;
My fancy gave her eyes of blue,
A curly auburn head:
I came to find the blue a green,
The auburn turned to red.

She boxed my ears this morning,
They tingled very much;
I own that I could wish her
A somewhat lighter touch;
And if you ask me how
Her charms might be improved,
I would not have them added to,
But just a few removed!

She has the bear's ethereal grace,
The bland hyaena's laugh,
The footstep of the elephant,
The neck of a giraffe;
I love her still, believe me,
Though my heart its passion hides;
"She's all my fancy painted her,"

But oh! how much besides!

Like so many of Lewis Carroll's verses, this is a parody of a popular poem of its day, now pretty much forgotten. The parodied poem here was 'Alice Gray' by William Mee:

She's all my fancy painted her,
She's lovely, she's divine,
But her heart it is another's,
She never can be mine;
Yet lov'd I as man never lov'd,
A love without decay,
Oh! my heart, my heart is breaking
For the love of Alice Gray!

Her dark brown hair is braided
O'er a brow of spotless white;
Her soft blue eye now languishes,
Now flashes with delight;
Her hair is braided not for me,
The eye is turned away;
Yet my heart, my heart is breaking
For the love of Alice Gray.

I've sunk beneath the summer's sun,
And trembled in the blast;
But my pilgrimage is nearly done,
The weary conflict's past;
And when the green sod wraps my grave,
Oh, his heart, his heart is broken
For the love of Alice Gray.

FORGOTTEN HOBBITS (II)

2012-01-24T00:01:00.003Z

Back to those lost Hobbits...

In 1967, the year after Gene Deitch's heavilly-condensed (and wildly re-envisioned) film version of Tolkien's tale of Mr Baggins and his journey 'there and back again', America's greatest contemporary illustrator, Maurice Sendak – the man who took us to Where the Wild Things Are – was invited by Tolkien's American publisher to produce new illustrations for the upcoming 30th anniversary edition of the book.

Maurice Sendak's self-portrait with one of his heroes who
would not have endeared him to Professor Tolkien!

Tolkien, who was 75, asked to see some sample illustrations from the 39-year-old Sendak, who grudgingly produced two pieces of art: one showing wood-elves dancing in the moonlight; the other depicting Bilbo sitting outside Bag End, smoking his pipe, as Gandalf arrives to disrupt his morning.

Writing of this latter (and only surviving Sendak Hobbit drawing) Tony DiTerlizzi wrote in the Los Angeles Times last year:

Here is a real passion and understanding of content and audience in these spec pieces. Sendak rendered these in a detailed pen-and-ink style similar to that of the illustrations for Higglety Pigglety Pop! and Little Bear. It hearkens back to epic pastoral imagery seen in etchings by the likes of Rembrandt and Samuel Palmer. If you look closely, you will discover a master at work in the art of subtlety: Notice the heavy crosshatching used to weigh down a world-weary Gandalf contrasted with the open, airy line work that renders the jovial Bilbo. These depictions speak in an artistic conversation that has been ongoing for centuries, yet they are immediate and approachable by the child of today.

Art samples were prepared for Tolkien’s consideration but, unfortunately, due to an error in labelling, the dancing wood-elves were erroneously identified as hobbits. Tolkien, apparently not best-pleased at what he supposed to be the artist's failure to pay adequate attention to the text, refused to approve the commission.

Desperately hoping to resolve the misunderstanding, the publisher arranged a meeting in Oxford between author and artist while Sendak was in the UK for the British publication of Where the Wild Things Are.

But, alas, it was not to be: on the day prior to the planned meeting, Sendak suffered a major heart attack and spent several weeks in a hospital in Birmingham. The meeting was never rescheduled and Sendak never illustrated The Hobbit.

One can only regret that this wonderful illustrator was denied the opportunity to depict the wild things of Middle-earth...

Images: © Maurice Sendak

FORGOTTEN HOBBITS (I)

2012-01-21T00:01:00.003Z

Busily writing, as I am, about Peter Jackson's forthcoming film of The Hobbit, I was intrigued, recently, to read about two forgotten attempts to visualise – on film and in book form – J R R Tolkien's story about the mild-mannered, stay-at-home Mr Bilbo Baggins whom Gandalf the wizard inveigles into accepting the role of burglar in the employ of a company of dwarves who set out to recover their lost treasure-hoard from the clutches of the dragon Smaug...

Today, I am telling the adventures of one of those lost Hobbits...

In 1964, three years before the Sendak debacle, a Hollywood movie-chancer, William L ('Bill') Snyder snapped up the film rights to The Hobbit for peanuts and passed it to Oscar-winning Czech animator, Eugene Merril ('Gene') Deitch (right) who animated various animated series (including Popeye and Tom & Jerry) and who began work on a screenplay for an animated film with three-dimensional model backgrounds.

The script played fast and lose with the original text (the company of dwarves were dropped and a Princess was introduced!); however, had the project gone ahead it might have developed into something quite intriguing, since Deitch planned to collaborate with the legendary Czech illustrator and puppet film-maker, Jiří Trnka.

But that was not what happened: Snyder and Deitch pitched the film to 20th Century Fox, who turned it down partly because the asking price was too high and the craze for Tolkien (that might have justified Snyder's budget) was still in the future – though nearer than anyone imagined. A matter of months later, Snyder was demanding that Deitch produce a one-reel film of The Hobbit within thirty days. The original contract was for the production of “a full-color motion picture version” of Tolkien's by June 30, 1966.

Since there was no stipulation that the film had to be animated or of any particular length, Snyder wanted a 12-minute, single reel of 35mm film so that it could be screened in New York before those rights, picked up for a song, ran out. Working with his close friend, the Czech illustrator, Adolf Born, Deitch created a storyboard and filmed the illustrations with a few very-limited animation effects. Herb Lass, an American broadcaster working for the English service on Czechoslovak Radio, narrated the film.

It was finished and shown in a private screening room in New York City with the audience (pulled in from passers-by on the street) who were given a dime a-piece with which to 'pay' for their seats! Snyder secured his hold on the rights which he then sold back for almost $100,000!

You can read the full, crazy story, on Deitch's blog, genedeitchcredits and, below, you can watch the 12-minute, whistle-stop version of The Hobbit – with its Groans and Gablins (instead of Trolls and Goblins), the subterranean owner of the Ring, Golloom, and a dragon named Slag the Terrible...

After watching this supremely succinct first-ever film of The Hobbit, it must, surely, raise questions about Peter Jackson's indulgent two-movie project!

My next post will feature the saga of another forgotten Hobbit...

My thanks to Jen Miller for telling me about this extraordinary cinematic curiosity.

Top image: 'Conversation with Smaug' by J R R Tolkien

SITWELL BY SIBLEY

2012-01-18T00:01:00.008Z

One of the nicer things about having to shift stacks of books and papers for the pending move has been the finding of things long forgotten, including a small cache of Sibley drawings that have recently come to light.

As a young man, one of my ambitions was to become (in addition being an actor) a cartoonist and caricaturist. My drawing board idols were three artists who dominated my imagination and whose names began with an 'S': Searle, Scarfe and Steadman.

Here is a caricature I made in my late teens of the poet (and glorious eccentric) Dame Edith Sitwell...

I think, when I made this cartoon, I had only recently discovered Facade: An Entertainment, the work that Dame Edith created in collaboration with William Walton and which, to a young enthusiast of the nonsense literature of Lewis Carroll and Edward Lear seemed to have more than a little in the way of kinship to the lands where Tulgey Woods and Bong Trees might grow!

Here is a short selection of numbers from Facade, performed on a 1953 British Decca recording by the poet and Peter Pears with Anthony Collins conducting The English Opera Group Ensemble...

NEW HEIGHTS

2012-01-15T14:11:00.007Z

Today, the hit-counter on my blog went from this...

To this...

So, since a little celebration is clearly called for, I thought some fireworks might do the job!

Below is how, two weeks ago, the Venetians saw in 2012 on the Bacino San Marco.

There's a slightly overlong, boring, bit about 1:30 in when there seems to be nothing much going on except a puddle of light on the waters of the lagoon (about as effective as reported accounts of the 'river of fire' on the Thames at the Millennium), but it soon picks up again and ends with the usual blitzkrieg of dazzling whiteness that everyone expects.

An amusing postscript: the 31 December 2011 edition of Venice Word made the following announcement...

NEWS - To avert the annual risk of animals being frightened, literally, to death by the deafening noise of fireworks, major Italian cities are limiting traditional midnight fireworks displays or, as in Turin, banning them entirely. There is also hope that the reduction will lower the number of injuries to humans due to the improper use of the gunpowder. Venice will be among those imposing limitations.

I didn't see this year's firework display (it was too far for me to walk to a vantage point, so David went and filmed it), but sitting in our favourite restaurant, I certainly heard them - as, presumably, did the city's animal populace!

Quiet fireworks? Hmmm... Not sure – even in our politically correct society – that they're ever going to catch on!

WINTER DRAWERS ON

2012-01-14T00:01:00.002Z

Tonight, the temperature is just 1 degree and this is a vintage Damart advertisement.

Any further comment would be superfluous...

WHAT BOOKS DO AT NIGHT!

2012-01-12T00:01:00.000Z

Thanks to Michael and SCB for sending me a link to a wonderful little film animated by Sean and Lisa Ohlenkamp.

It had all started innocently enough when the Ohlenkamps decided to creatively (and repeatedly) rearrange their bookshelves at home and photograph the process with a stop-frame camera...

But then they got a bit more ambitious and started spending numerous sleepless nights moving, stacking, and animating books at Type bookstore in Toronto. The result is a magical glimpse into the private night-life of a bookshop.

If Mr and Mrs O are free just now, there are some bookshelves here that could do with a bit of clearing!

TITUS NOMINATED

2012-01-09T15:35:00.011Z

Last autumn, the BBC announced that it was launching an annual Audio Awards ceremony and the short-listed nominees for the first of these events have just been announced.

I am thrilled to find that The History of Titus Groan, my six-part serialisation of the novels of Mervyn Peake has been nominated in three categories:

Best Supporting Actor/Actress in an Audio Drama for Carl Prekopp who played Steerpike

Best Use of Sound in an Audio Drama for Producers David Hunter, Gemma Jenkins and Jeremy Mortimer

and

Best Adaptation for Me!

The winners will be announced at a ceremony in the BBC Radio Theatre at Broadcasting House on Sunday 29 January, when the awards will be presented by David Tennant.

The competition in all three categories is very strong, but, whatever the outcome, it is very satisfying indeed to have had a piece of my work nominated - and the only one in the competition to have receive three nominations.

I'm also delighted that it led to my stumbling on the following review by Bella Todd from Time Out, which I missed when it first appeared:

Dark, angular and haunting, the portraits Mervyn Peake sketched for his Gormenghast series were integral to the evocation of a fantasy kingdom hewn from stone. And they’re given a presence in Brian Sibley’s star-studded BBC radio dramatisation of all four books The History of Titus Groan. In an idea borrowed from Titus Awakes, the recently discovered ‘final novel’ written from fragments of a draft by Peake’s widow Maeve Gilmore, this epic radio play is framed by a meeting between the hero, Titus Groan (Luke Treadaway), reluctant Earl of Gormenghast, and ‘The Artist’ (a world-weary David Warner). He welcomes his protagonist into a canvas-filled studio and describes drawing as ‘a way of holding back some fleeting, line, rhythm, mood or shape from the blink of oblivion’. Moving and sensual as well as funny and grotesque, this is perfect listening for Peake’s centenary year.

All six hours of The History of Titus Groan can be downloaded here – and for just £7.86!

SCORING THE MUSICALS

2012-01-07T00:01:00.010Z

How did you do with our Musical Film Quiz?

There were fewer entries than I'd imagined: more of you must have a life than I'd supposed! And whatever became of the entry from the supremely confident Polkadotsoph, I'll never know!

However, the speed with which those who did enter entered was staggering!

First home with a full set of 60 correct answers (and within less than three hours of the quiz being posted, too!) was GOOD DOG. Congratulations!

Only a few hours later, came another complete and accurate set of answers from SHEILA & ROGER – who were angling for bonus points for offering, in addition to the correct solution, an alternative to DD/AN - Derby Day / Anna Neagle (above left), but which was not, I think, a musical!; and then, shortly afterward (but from the other side of the Atlantic) came a third correct set from MICHAEL.

So, well done to you three, too – and to EUDORA and SCB for creditable, if not quite entire, entries.

And for those who care, here are the answers...

1. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang / Dick Van Dyke

2. The Wizard of Oz / Bert Lahr

3. Doctor Dolittle / Anthony Newley

4. Mary Poppins / David Tomlinson

5. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory / Gene Wilder

6. The Slipper and the Rose / Richard Chamberlain

7. Star! / Daniel Massey

8. Hans Christian Andersen / Danny Kaye

9. The Sound of Music / Eleanor Parker

10. Singin' in the Rain / Donald O'Connor

11. Meet Me in St Louis / Margaret O'Brien

12. Camelot / Vanessa Redgrave

13. Caberet / Joel Grey

14. Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street / Helena Bonham Carter

15. Royal Wedding / Fred Astaire

16. Hello Dolly! / Louis Armstrong

17. Song of Norway / Harry Secombe

18. Top Hat / Ginger Rogers

19. Thoroughly Modern Millie / Mary Tyler Moore

20. Million Dollar Mermaid / Esther Williams

21. Alice's Adventures in Wonderland / Fiona Fullerton

22. Fiddler on the Roof / Chaim Topol

23. Man of La Mancha / Sophia Loren

24. Goodbye, Mr Chips / Peter O'Toole

25. Bedknobs and Broomsticks / Angela Lansbury

26. A Star is Born / James Mason

27. Gentlemen Prefer Blondes / Jane Russell

28. Babes in Arms / Mickey Rooney

29. Finnian's Rainbow / Tommy Steele

30. Kiss Me Kate / Howard Keel

31. Show Boat / Kathryn Grayson

32. The Broadway Melody / Bessie Love

33. Gigi / Louis Jourdan

34. South Pacific / Rossano Brazzi

35. The King and I / Deborah Kerr

36. West Side Story / Natalie Wood

37. Oklahoma! / Gordon MacRae

38. Carousel / Shirley Jones

39. Chicago / Renee Zellweger

40. Funny Girl / Omar Sharif

41. On the Town / Frank Sinatra

42. An American in Paris / Gene Kelly

43. Moulin Rouge! / Ewan McGregor

44. Yankee Doodle Dandy / James Cagney

45. Evita / Madonna

46. Grease / John Travolta

47. All That Jazz / Roy Schneider

48. Jesus Christ Superstar / Ted Neeley

49. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers / Jane Powell

50. My Fair Lady / Stanley Holloway

51. High Society / Bing Crosby

52. Annie / Albert Finney

53. White Christmas / Rosemary Clooney

54. The Muppet Christmas Carol / Kermit the Frog

55. Mamma Mia! / Pierce Brosnan

56. Oliver! / Ron Moody

57. Guys and Dolls / Stubby Kaye

58. A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum / Buster Keaton

59. Paint Your Wagon / Clint Eastwood

60. On a Clear Day You Can See Forever / Yves Montand

And the answers to Sheila's follow-up selection submitted via the comments section to my original post:

1. Gypsy / Ethel Merman

2. The Young Ones / Robert Morley

3. Help! / Leo McKern

4. The Boy Friend / Christopher Gable

5. Blue Hawaii / Angela Lansbury

6. Some Like It Hot / George Raft

7. The Producers / Gene Wilder

8. A Chorus Line / Michael Douglas

9. A Night At The Opera / Harpo Marx

10. Call Me Madam / George Sanders

ON THE TWELFTH DAY OF CHRISTMAS

2012-01-06T12:25:00.007Z

A little Wordle – remember Wordle? – for Epiphany...

If you don't know Wordle - check it out!

For a more spiritual celebration of the day, here's 'The Adoration of the Magi' painted in 1542 by Jacopo Bassano and now hanging in the National Gallery of Scotland...

I do love the fact that even when painting a sacred subject these Italians can't resist adding a good bottom – or, in this case (if you count man and horse), two bottoms!

FAREWELL, SEARLE

2012-01-03T16:27:00.023Z

RONALD SEARLE

1920-2011

The 'Master' is gone: unquestionably one of the all-time great cartoonists, illustrators and graphic artists has died at the age of 91.

As the tributes to his work are already showing (and as he knew they would) Ronald Searle will be labelled and pigeon-holed as the creator of St Trinian's – despite his best endeavours to distance himself from that heinous establishment – but there was so very much more to the man and his work.

The British gave him a CBE, but the knighthood he ought to have received came in the form of a Chevalier de la Legion d'Honneur from the people of France, among whom he lived and for whose journals he was still drawing long after his homeland had all but forgotten his reputation as a master of comic art and social comment.

The diversity of his work is staggeringly impressive: cartoons with jokey captions; trenchant satires; brilliant caricatures; stunning exercises in graphic reportage; humorous advertising art; posters and title cards for movies and dramatic and dynamic book illustrations (from war stories to kid's fables) all executed left-handedly in a variety of media and styles, but chiefly in the scratchy, spidery, pen-and-ink line (with sombre shadows – created using wood-stain – and occasional flurries of ink spatters) that became the instantly recognisable hallmark of his work.

Searle was the very first cartoonist under whose spell I fell as a young boy and whose work I have adored ever since and ever will do.

A man of wit and wicked humour (no one has captured the essence of 'cat' quite like Searle), his art is often leavened by disturbingly dark undertones.

Perhaps it was the fact that he survived the infamous Japanese POW camp, Changi Gaol – where matters of life and death were a daily lottery – that informed his frequently caustic, jaundiced take on the absurdist buffoonery of our world and fired what seems an often obsessive fascination with the frailties of humankind and the cruelties of human unkindness.

For those who would like to read more about Ronald Searle, click on the coloured links below to go to a few of my previous posts:

Last year's birthday tribute: Searly Days: Ronald Searle at 90

An introduction to some of my favourite Searly Folk

A few notes on those St Trinian's cartoons (and films) Hell's Belles and the St T cartoon that is a prized exhibit in the Weeks-Sibley Collection...

From Searle's sojourn in the US, there are his TV Guide cartoons inspired by Bewitched

Mr Searle & Mrs Mole celebrates Searle's last published work, Les Très Riches Heures de Mrs Mole.

This series of forty-seven drawings were made for his wife, Monica, when she was diagnosed with cancer in 1969.

Never originally intended for publication, they were exhibited last year to help promote breast cancer charities and made a powerful impact because of Mrs Mole's joyous delight in the world around her and her innocent optimism.

A limited edition book followed along with prints of the drawings signed by Ronald and Monica, although, sadly, the trade edition of the book appeared after Monica's death last summer.

And, finally...

A memory of the first Searle-illustrated book I ever owned: James Thurber's The 13 Clocks & The Wonderful O.

Last year, through the good offices of a couple of animator friends who were visiting the Searles, I sent my treasured copy of The 13 Clocks with a request that the artist might consider signing it for me. The book came back with a fulsome and very personal inscription that makes it all the more precious.

– for Brian Sibley
with not only kind regards but with regards for your
kindness and, as they say,
fidelity.
Yours,
Ronald –
aka
Ronald Searle
long after the date of
these Clocks
September 2010

FRESH 'N' WILD

2012-01-02T23:01:00.003Z

This is, without question, the freshest salad I've ever been served!

Photo: David Weeks

RING IN THE NEW

2012-01-01T00:01:00.006Z

This illustration of tree branches making up the words, “Happy New Year” was published in 1876 by Currier and Ives. The black and white lithograph was then hand-coloured by a series of Currier and Ives production artists, each artist colouring one item or items receiving the same colour.

The popularity of Currier and Ives prints depicting Christmas and winter themes was immortalised in a line in the lyrics of the seasonal song, 'Sleigh Ride':

There's a happy feeling
Nothing in the world can buy,
When they pass around the chocolate
And the pumpkin pie
It'll nearly be like a picture print
By Currier and Ives
These wonderful things are the things
We remember all through our lives!

You can read more about Nathaniel Currier and James Merritt Ives here and here.

With Every Good Wish for Love, Joy,
Health and Happiness in
2012

Image from The Stock Solution

SCENT CRAZY

2011-12-28T23:01:00.002Z

You know how, nowadays, wine no longer tastes of what it is traditionally made from – grapes – but, according to the back-label, may be described in terms of various fruits, coffee, chocolate, chili, pine-needles, aromatic herbs or flint – when did you last suck on a piece of flint?

Well, it could be that this is just a drinker's version of the way in which perfumes have always been been described: interestingly, usually in terms of things you eat and therefore taste as well as smell.

I came across some 'ripe' descriptions recently that I thought you might enjoy...

Paco Rabane 1 Million

This comes in a bottle that looks like a gold ingot (but isn't!) and is is described in terms of a fruit cocktail, thus: "This fragrance is fresh and sparkling with notes of grapefruit, mint and orange, creating a striking mix of sophistication and sensuality."

Or to give you the essence of that pictorially...

Then there is...

Boss Orange Man

This 'new feel-good fragrance for liberated guys', as used by Orlando Bloom, is; "An energising blend of crispy apple, comforting vanilla, warm frankincense and exotic West African bubinga woo0d." (What wood?)

In contrast...

Carolina Herrera 212 VIP MEN

Is a fragrance that might be described (apparently) as "...a party animal! It's a cocktail of vodka, passion fruit, frozen mint, ginger, black pepper, lime, caviar, leather spices, amber and king wood." (Yes, more wood!) As the ad copy says – almost incredulously – "All that in one bottle."

And (finally for this selection) there is...

CK SHOCK for him

This fragrance is, we are told, "...built around aromatic, spicy nuances. It opens with fresh cucumber and sugar. The heart of black pepper, black basil and cardamon is placed on the base of masculine tobacco [ as opposed to the feminine variety?] musk, patchouli and [yes, of course, what else?] ambrene wood."

I'm exhausted before I've even got the top of the bottle...

Oh, well, maybe just stick with the Old Spice, then...

DECK THE PILLS

2011-12-26T23:01:00.000Z

It is possible to add a seasonal embellishment to even the dullest bits of daily life!

QUIZ: INITIAL MUSICALS

2011-12-25T23:01:00.000Z

Exhausted by yesterday's eating-drinking-present-opening-TV-watching marathon?

Time to chill out while engaging in a little brain-cell-stimulation!

A BOXING DAY (that's the Day-After-Christmas-Day for my American cousins) QUIZ on the theme of FILM MUSICALS.

Below are the titles of sixty musical films represented by their initial letters, together with the initials of one of the stars.

So, for example, the film on the left might be F-SS (42S would be too easy!) / RK (for Ruby Keeler).

I have also included one or two picture clues – just to help get you started!

1. CCBB / DVD

2. TWOO / BL

3. DD / AN

4. MP / DT

5. WWATCF / GW

6. TSATR / RC

7. S! / DM

8. HCA / DK

9. TSOM / EP

10. SITR / DOC

11. MMISL / MOB

12. C / VR

13. C / JG

14. ST:TDBOFS / HBC

15. RW / FA

16. HD! / LA

17. SON / HS

18. TH / GR

19. TMM / MTM

20. MDM / EW

21. AAIW / FF

22. FOTR / CT

23. MOLM / SL

24. GMC / POT

25. BAB / AL

26. ASIB / JM

27. GPB / JR

28. BIA / MR

29. FR / TS

30. KMK / HK

31. SB / KG

32. TBM / BL

33. G / LJ

34. SP / RB

35. TKAI / DK

36. WSS / NW

37. O! / GMR

38. C / SJ

39. C / RZ

40. FG / OS

41. OTT / FS

42. AAIP / GK

43. MR! / EMG

44. YDD / JC

45. E / M

46. G / JT

47. ATJ / RS

48. JCS / TN

49. SBFSB / JP

50. MFL / SH

51. HS / BC

52. A / AF

53. WC / RC

54. TMCC / KTF

55. MM / PB

56. O! / RM

57. GAD / SK

58. AFTHOTWTTF / BK

59. PYW / CE

60. OACDYCSF / YM

GOOD LUCK! When you've answered as many as you can send me your solutions via the comments to this post. Answers (and winners) will be blogged on 7 January!

ADESTE FIDELIS

2011-12-25T00:01:00.009Z

Greetings, Love and Blessings
at
C H R I S T M A S T I D E

Immensity cloistered in thy dear womb,
Now leaves His well-belov'd imprisonment,
There He hath made Himself to His intent
Weak enough, now into the world to come;
But O, for thee, for Him, hath the inn no room?
Yet lay Him in this stall, and from the Orient,
Stars and wise men will travel to prevent
The effect of Herod's jealous general doom.
Seest thou, my soul, with thy faith's eyes, how He
Which fills all place, yet none holds Him, doth lie?
Was not His pity towards thee wondrous high,
That would have need to be pitied by thee?
Kiss Him, and with Him into Egypt go,
With His kind mother, who partakes thy woe.

Nativity, A Christmas Poem - John Donne

"God Bless Us, Everyone!"

Images: Christmas Crib in Venice by Brian Sibley; Brian & David by Nghiem Ta

...AND YET ANOTHER CHRISTMAS EVE

2011-12-23T23:01:00.005Z

In the words of a recent BBC press-release: "On the day before Christmas, BBC Radio 4 Extra has myriad yuletide classics..." one of which, I have (immodestly) to confess is a programme by Yours Truly!

Thirty-four years ago, I submitted what was only my second programme for radio and which is now one of Radio 4 Extra's "yuletide classics".

Entitled ...And Yet Another Partridge in a Pear Tree, it's a quirky take on that well-known song about the seasonal gifts which someone sent to his True Love on the Twelve Days of Christmas.

It was, I later discovered, not exactly a new joke and it has been re-worked by many others since, but it had the distinctive twist of literally following the cumulative list in the lyrics, thus providing the recipient not with one partridge in a pear tree, two turtle doves, three French hens and so on, but with twelve partridges, twenty-two turtle doves, thirty French hens and so forth.

I was extremely fortunate in having Penelope Keith (left) then at the height of her fame as Margot Leadbetter in the wildly successful TV sit-com, The Good Life, play Miss Cynthia Bracegirdle, the increasingly harassed lady who has to cope with (among other nuisances) forty maids a-milking, thirty-six ladies dancing, thirty lords a-leaping and twenty-two pipers piping...

...And Yet Another Partridge was repeated annually for many years and is still broadcast at Christmas from America to Australia. In fact, every year I get requests for copies of the broadcast (which unfortunately is not possible because the BBC have never commercially released the programme) and transcripts of Miss Bracegirdle's correspondence.

Anyway, if – like others – you remember this little piece of fluff and would like to hear it again or if you've never heard it and think it might tickle your funny bone (as, indeed, I believe it might), then TODAY'S the DAY!

This tragi-comic tale gets yet another outing this afternoon on BBC Radio 4 Extra and the partridges start coming home to roost at 14.40, after which, it can be heard on 'Listen Again' via BBC iPlayer for the next seven days.

And as a little Christmas Gift from Me to You, here are the uncensored Bracegirdle Letters (illustrated with photographs of the fabulous 2007 window displays from the Piccadilly emporium of Messrs Fortnum and Mason); you may care to ponder its message as you wrap - and unwrap - your Christmas gifts!

...AND YET ANOTHER PARTRIDGE
IN A PEAR TREE

A Cautionary Tale for Christmas Showing
that it is Better to Give than to Receive

by Brian Sibley

My very dearest Algy,

How can I begin to thank you for your charming Christmas gift? What luxury! My very own pear tree, with that dear little pheasant in it - or is it supposed to be a partridge? You really are a foolish boy! Actually, the birdie isn't wildly attractive, but the pear tree should be lovely - when pears are in season again.

Thank you, my darling.

All my love - forever.

Your ownest affectionate,

Cynthia

My dearest Algy,

You are quite impossible, my love. The turtle doves are adorable! They're already cooing away like anything; and, I must say, their amorous behavior leaves very little to the imagination. But I expect they will settle down in time.

Thank you, my sweeting.

Affectionately yours,

Cynthia

PS: I almost forgot to thank you for the second partridge-in-pear-tree thing: it balances up the other side of the fireplace so nicely.

Dearest Algernon,

You know, poppet, you are simply going too, too far! Your latest gift has just been delivered: what an imaginative boy you are to think of sending me something as unusual as three French hens. I'm only sorry that I hadn't told you that I am allergic to eggs. Never mind I can always sell some to the neighbours who, incidentally, have been much entertained by the sight of the postman struggling along each morning with the pear trees. Much love, Cynthia

Dear Algernon,

I suppose it's silly of me, but I am seriously beginning to wonder whether you aren't trying to get me to start an aviary. Your four 'colly birds' have just arrived and could, more aptly, be described as 'call-y birds', since that is what they seem to do best! Perhaps you could let me know whether colly birds are in the laying business or whether they are intended for human consumption; Mrs Beeton is, I find, surprisingly silent on the matter.

I can honestly say, Algernon, that I'd always thought birds were rather pleasant little creatures,
until you gave me this opportunity of observing them at such close quarters.

Love,

Cynthia

PS: I do hope you got a reasonable discount on all the pear trees.

Algernon, Thank you for your latest gift of five curtain rings, a somewhat curious present but, nevertheless, a refreshing change from all those very pretty, but somewhat noisy, birds you will keep sending me. I doubt if I should have bought so large a turkey for Christmas had I known what you had in mind. Could we ease up a bit on the fowl, do you think? Cordially, Cynthia

Dear Algernon Fotherington-Smythe,

I see we are back with the birds again! Your six geese a-laying have just arrived, and are happily doing so for all they're worth. I rather thought I'd mentioned to you how it was with me and eggs...

Thank you for putting me right about the curtain rings - I never could tell the difference between brass and gold. Of course, I am very pleased that you should have thought of sending me another five, just so that I have one for every finger. But as I now have more hens, doves and partridges than I rightly know how to cope with, and as they aren't too fussy about personal hygiene, I seldom seem to have my hands out of a bucket of water long enough to try them on! Yours, Cynthia B

Dear Mr Fotherington-Smythe,

I have just succeeded in accommodating your seven swans a-swimming in my bath - which was no mean achievement when one considers the number of pear trees on the landing! Regrettably, the geese got to the rings before I could, so that's probably the last we've seen of them - would I could say the same for the geese! I must now ask you to desist from sending me any more of these well-intentioned but slightly impracticable gifts. Cynthia Bracegirdle PS: I hadn't realised just how messy moulting partridges can be, or how badly they seem to get on in captivity with other birds.

Mr Fotherington-Smythe,

Fresh milk is one thing, eight enormous Friesians in the drawing room is something else altogether!

True, the milkmaids have a certain rustic charm, but you wouldn't believe how much they eat. You may also care to note that my bath has only so much room in it for swans with a seemingly insatiable urge to be a-swimming, and it will definitely not hold fourteen of them! Take that from one who has tried!

Please call a halt to this absurd behavior.

Miss Cynthia Bracegirdle

Mr Smythe!

Thanks to your weird sense of humor, my house is now in utter chaos! As if it wasn't bad enough having sixteen cows producing milk by the gallon, we now have nine 'ladies' - as you amusingly call them - dancing here, there and everywhere, one of whom seems to be working out a somewhat extraordinary routine involving several doves and a goose!

The most charitable view I can take of your actions is that you are out of your tiny mind.

Enough's enough!

PACK IT IN!!

Miss C Bracegirdle

PS: Fortunately, one of the partridges has just drowned itself in a bucket of milk.

Unspeakable wretch!

Your misguided generosity has apparently now led you to suppose that I could find some use for ten Lords a-leaping. They might lend a hand with cleaning up all the rancid milk and bird-lime - if they'd only stop leaping around after the dancing girls for five minutes!

I understand the entire neighborhood is now up in arms about it all and the Residents' Association has sent a petition to the local Member of Parliament.

Thumping on the front door at this precise moment are no less that two dozen representatives from various government bodies and from the Societies for the Prevention of Cruelty to hens, doves, geese, swans, cows, partridges and, for all I know, pear trees! And the bizarre inter-breeding amongst the birds is to be the subject of an article by a leading ornithologist in the next issue of Bird Monthly!

The recent outbreaks of crop-blight, fowl-pest and foot-and-mouth disease have now reached epidemic proportions; and if the antics I witnessed behind the pear trees this afternoon are anything to go by, several of the milkmaids should soon find themselves in, what polite society calls, an interesting condition.

For your information, I have now reached the end of my tether - which is more than can be said for those damn cows of yours!

C Bracegirdle (Miss)

CRETINOUS TOAD!!

Have you got even the remotest idea what eleven pipers piping sounds like at two o'clock in the morning? Of course, it only adds very slightly to the hideous cacophony of noise that I must now daily endure. I swear there's more mooing, cooing, honking, clucking and calling here than in the zoological gardens. If there were any room left, I might seriously consider opening the place to the public.

Your latest shipment of lords, ladies and livestock is now settled into the furore and by the same post came received a letter advising of a visit which the Minister of Agriculture and Fisheries intends to make this afternoon - supposing he can get in the door that is!

One good thing at least is that the latest influx of birds have put the cows off giving milk; I can hear them now - uprooting the pear trees in the orchard I once called a living room!

My landlord has taken out an eviction order against me, as he claims, somewhat surprisingly, that the terms of my lease do not cover utilisation of the premises as a menagerie, dancing school, smallholding or annex of the House of Lords.

C B

PS: Please be advised that all future correspondence between us will be handled by my solicitors, Messrs Grabble, Twister and Fleecem.

Grabble, Twister and Fleecem Chancey Chambers Suet-under-Writ (Off the Eastbourne Road) Sussex

Dear Mr Smith,

Re: Miss Cynthia Bracegirdle, deceased

We are the executors of the estate of the above-named deceased, and are writing to acknowledge receipt of your recent delivery of twelve drummers drumming.

You will no doubt be distressed to learn that, shortly after the arrival of these gentlemen, our client, in what must be described as a somewhat deranged state of mind, travelled to Eastbourne and threw herself off the top of Beachy Head.

Before taking this step, however, she left instructions with ourselves for the adding of a codicil to her Last Will and Testament, under which you become her sole beneficiary and legatee.

I am, therefore, arranging for the following items to be delivered to you later this day:

12 drummers drumming
22 pipers piping
30 lords a-leaping
36 ladies dancing
40 maids a-milking
42 swans a-swimming
42 geese a-laying
40 gold rings
36 colly birds
30 French hens
22 turtle doves
and 11 partridges with 12 accompanying pear trees.

With our sincere congratulations on your inheritance and assuring you of our best attention at all times,

Yours faithfully,

Grabble, Twister and Fleecem

...And Yet Another Partridge in a Pear Tree was originally broadcast on BBC Radio 4 on Christmas Day 1977 and starred PENELOPE KEITH as Cynthia Bracegirdle with TIMOTHY BATESON as Mr Graball. The programme was directed by JOHN THEOCHARIS.

Text and photographs: © Brian Sibley, 1977, 2007, 2011

THE REAL THING?

2011-12-23T00:01:00.005Z

There's just one more sleep until the night when that fat, jolly, old, bearded gent in the red suit will (hopefully) be squeezing himself down our chimneys and distributing his annual largesse!

But, as few of us have ever seen him on his 24 December rounds (unless we caught him kissing mummy under the mistletoe) how come we recognise him so easily?

Well, much of what we know about Santa's appearance was established by the American cartoonist Thomas Nast, responsible for the iconic image on the right and others which you will find here.

But, certainly as far as American sensibilities are concerned, the image of Christmas' Patron Saint (aka St Nicholas, Father Christmas and many other names in different lands) was reinforced by the work of the great illustrator, Norman Rockwell (you can view some oif his Santas here), as well as through a series of annual advertising campaigns for Coca Cola that began 80 years ago, this December!

For a considerable time, Coke was thought of as a being warm weather drink – a thirst-quencher – but from 1922, the Coca-Cola Company began advertising their drink as one to be consumed the whole year round with the slogan: "Thirst Knows No Season".

Then, in 1931, came the first of a long line of seasonal promotions featuring Santa as an enthusiastic drinker of Coke.

The work of Michigan-born illustrator, Haddon Sundblom (left), who used himself as a model for his portrayals of Santa, provided much loved advertisements in the pages of The Saturday Evening Post, The National Geographic, The New Yorker and The Ladies Home Journal.

These ads (in addition to selling Coca Cola) helped shape our perceptions of our late-night Christmas Eve visitor.

Here is that Santas on a few of his annual outings...

And, 80 years on, Santa is still raising a bottle of Coke to the Season on bill-boards the world over and in TV commercials...

I HOPE SANTA BRINGS YOU
YOUR CHRISTMAS HEART'S DESIRE...

AND...

If you haven't heard it, my dramatisation of P L (Mary Poppins) Travers' mystical Christmas fable, The Fox at the Manger, is being re-broadcast today on BBC Radio 4 Extra at 11:15 and 21:15 and repeated tomorrow, Christmas Eve, at 04:15 and for the next seven days on BBC iPlayer.

The play tells the story of what gift the wild and wayward fox took to stable in Bethlehem and gave to the new-born Christ Child.

Starring Wendy Hiller as the Storyteller and Alec McCowan as the Fox, it features the ancient Carol, 'The Friendly Beasts', and a memorably evocative music score by Dave Hewson.

Image: Fox woodcut by Thomas Bewick

GOOD MAN JOSEPH

2011-12-22T00:01:00.003Z

My very good blog friend, Eudora, sent me this beautiful Adoration of the Magi as a Christmas greeting...

Painted with tempera on pine in c. 1420 it forms the right wing of a triptych altarpiece for the church in Ortenberg (a town in the district of Ortenau in Baden-Württemberg in Germany) but now housed in the Hessisches Landesmuseum, Darmstadt.

The picture is full of symbolism – such as the basket of bread (representing the Eucharist) hanging above the head of the Christ Child or the cross-shaped gift held by the King on the right, but what immediately caught my attention was the diminutive figure in the bottom left hand corner of the picture?

Who is that doing the cooking? By a process of elimination, there was only one person it could be...

I asked Eudora: "The chap with the cooking pan, is that Joseph?"

After a bit of research, Eudora, came back to me with some answers: yes it was Jesus' earthly father and the way he is represented by the anonymous artist is particularly interesting.

As one commentary puts it...

Joseph, the Virgin's husband who had not yet been canonized... was taken to typify the poor among the more distinguished personages of the Bible. In scenes of the Adoration of the Magi he is definitely depicted as the symbol of poverty... shown plying his craft as a carpenter or as the modest and diligent father of Jesus, doing household tasks, hanging up napkins to dry or cooking soup....

These pictures do not always evince a sympathy for poor people. Sometimes Joseph is mockingly ridiculed. In the Ortenberg Altarpiece, for example, the shabbily dressed, tiny figure is so fully engrossed in stirring the soup with a spoon he is grasping with both his hands, that he does not notice the presence of the Magi.

Personally, I'm with those who see in the image something less mocking and a reminder that this painting was made in an age when poverty and humility were regarded as virtues: I see Joseph as the practical provider of his little family.

The noble, ermine-clad magi may lay aside their crowns and bend their royal knees and present their mystical gifts to the holy Child, but Joseph just gets on with making sure there will be something to eat when the great and the good have gone on their way...

A CANINE CHRISTMAS CAROL

2011-12-21T00:01:00.002Z

Apologies, but I'm on about A Christmas Carol yet again...

Every year – pretty much without fail – somebody, somewhere comes up with a fresh take on Charles Dickens' seemingly immortal story: a newly illustrated edition, perhaps, or a stage, film or TV version that sets out to tell the oft-told tale anew.

Mr Magoo, Bugs Bunny, Mickey Mouse, The Flintstones and The Jetsons have all – for better or worse – had a go!

This year it's the turn of the on-line kid's show character, Ruffus the Dog and his puppet chums to tackle the classic.

It's not quite The Muppet's Christmas Carol and All Dogs Go to Heaven were there first with a canine re-working of the Carol, but it's got great charm and – all one can ask really – an obvious desire to capture the spirit of the original: which it does, wonderfully...

And here's a little behind-the-scenes video showing how a handful of people with, clearly, very limited resources, spent four days putting together their engaging little film.

You can visit Ruffus the Dog's website here; and you can read an interview with Ruffus' creator, Rob Mills, here.

"A TALE TO MAKE THE READER LAUGH AND CRY"

2011-12-19T00:01:00.011Z

Every year, around December, I find an excuse write something about what is, unquestionably my favourite books: Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol.

This year, on account of the show David and staged at the British Library, I have already bored you with my thoughts on the tale of Ebenezer Scrooge, "a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous, old sinner" who – through the intervention of a series of ghostly interviews – turns away from his miserly past towards a present and a future filled with the joyful happiness symbolised by Christmas.

A Christmas Carol was first published on this day in 1843, and was an instantaneous triumph. It became – and has remained for the past 168 years – a national (and international) treasure!

A contemporary reviewer said of it that it was "a tale to make the reader laugh and cry – to open his hands, and open his heart to charity even toward the uncharitable..."

On the book's publication, Thomas Hood wrote: "If Christmas, with its ancient and hospitable customs, its social and charitable observances, were ever in danger of decay, this is the book that would give them a new lease. The very name of the author predisposes one to the kindlier feelings; and a peep at the Frontispiece sets the animal spirits capering..."

Some years ago, now, I wrote A Christmas Carol: The Unsung Story, an entire book about Dickens' "ghost story of Christmas", partly inspired by decades of collecting various editions and versions of the story in all types of media and partly by Humbug!, a programme that I wrote and presented on BBC Radio 4 (according to my fellow Caroller, Mr Boll Weavil) on 22 December 1987.

On Christmas Day, 1993 – to mark the 150th anniversary of the original publication – a revised version of Humbug! was broadcast and – as I did at this time last year –I'm posting a recording of it on today's blog.

So, pour yourself a seasonal glass of something, heat up some mince pies, take a break from the pre-Christmas rush-and-tear and get into the spirit of the season with what, I hope, is still a mildly interesting account of how and why Charles Dickens was inspired to write what is, surely, his most famous book.

Along the way, you can enjoy some of the many interpretations – good, bad and downright ugly – that have been perpetrated over the years. And, after you have listened to some of these well-known, lesser-known and, sometimes, downright unlikely Scrooges, I defy all but the flintiest-hearted of you to say...

"HUMBUG!"

Images: Caricature of Charles Dickens by David Levine; Bob Cratchit & Tiny Tim by Fred Barnard, c. 1870; Scrooge and Marley's Ghost by John Leech, 1843.

BOYS WILL BE GIRLS

2011-12-17T00:01:00.015Z

A passing mention of Pantomimes the other day (specifically about a show that was not a panto) reminded me that I've an old photo that I want to share...

It came from David Drummond – of that treasure-house of showbiz memorabilia from bygone eras, Pleasures of Past Times – with whom I presented a recent evening on pantos at The Magic Circle.

As a child, I was mystified by the tradition of Dames being played by men and the leading men, or 'Principle Boys' (Aladdins, Robin Hoods, Robinson Crusoes and Dick Wittingtons), being played by GIRLS!

I always thought there was something a bit odd about the courtship between Snow White, Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty and the long-legged, bossomy lasses who were playing their Princes; but I have to say this image of music hall entertainer Fanny Robina in her 1907 Principle Boy get-up, stretches credulity pretty much to breaking point!

"Oh, no it doesn't!"

"Oh, yes it does!"

No wonder I grew up a bit confused about gender attraction issues!

THE LADY IS A GENT

2011-12-15T15:15:00.011Z

I can't remember when I had a more enjoyable night at the theatre than our recent visit to the Riverside Studios in Hammersmith, London, to see the new musical version of Oscar Wilde's The Importance of Being Ernest with the absurdly talented Gyles Brandreth as the redoubtable Lady Bracknell...

Wilde's greatest play – throughout the evening, the brilliant (and justly famous) lines cascade like a shimmering of shooting stars – has been gently updated from Victorian society to the 1920s and embellished with musical numbers (by lyricist, Douglas Livingstone and composers Adam McGuinness and Zia Moranne) that capture all the wit of the original and drive the plot through a two-hour running time that whistles by with carefree abandon.

Just as My Fair Lady feels like the show George Bernard Shaw would have written if he had been making Pygmalion as a musical, this is unquestionably Oscar Wilde's all-singing (and, with the aid of some nifty choreography) all-dancing Ernest.

Directed by Iqbal Khan, it exceeded my expectations (and silenced a few nagging doubts) chiefly because the writers and cast treat the original with respect and love in equal measure and – cavorting in a stylised set (an array of luggage containing pop-up trees and bushes) that adds its own charm to the frothy proceedings – manage to convey the importance of personal and social identity underlying the frivolity and the playwright's ruthless mockery of the more absurd manners of his day.

The actors playing the quartet of young lovers – Mark Edel-Hunt, Anya Murphy, Colin Ryan and Flora Spencer-Longhurst – acquit themselves splendidly, despite having to share the stage with the scene-stealing Edward Petherbridge and Susie Blake as a shyly, slyly, flirtatious Dr Chasuble and Miss Prism; Stefan Bednarczyk, the show's musical director, as a brace of butlers (town and country); and Mr Brandreth's imperious juggernaut of a Bracknell – every inch a lady, with the regal ramrod uprightness of the late Queen Mary.

Despite the cross-dressing, Brandreth's Bracknell is absolutely not a pantomime dame, she is as far from the much caricatured Edith Evans portrayal as it is possible to get. The much-anticipated two-word line (one of the best-known speeches in theatre) is not only delivered with the appropriate degree of incredulity but is a prologue to a patter song about handbags that carries the moment to new heights of humour.

And when her ladyship tempers her sharply cutting comments with warm twinklings of care and compassion, it is impossible not to believe that beneath the steely exterior a few memories yet remain of the heart-flutterings of her own youth.

The Importance of Being Ernest only runs until 31 December: so book before the word gets fully out that this is the don't-miss show of the Christmas season – and if you can't book a ticket, well, then beg, borrow or steal one!

And while on the subject of Messrs Brandreth and Wilde, let me enthusiastically recommend Gyles' brilliant series of literary thrillers The Oscar Wilde Murder Mysteries, the most recent of which is Oscar Wilde and the Vatican Murders.

Photo: Clara Molden

SOCIETY SNAPPER

2011-12-14T00:01:00.010Z

A new exhibition at Chris Beetles Fine Photographyre-affirms the late Patrick (Lord) Lichfield was one of Britain's great photographers, with an uncanny knack for capturing striking images across the different classes from royalty to the common folk!

His seemingly unobserved snap of Charles Chaplin and Marlon Brando – Chaplin hand on heart, Brando, hand on Chaplin's arm...

...is as revealing of character as his self-consciously informal (and, ironically, unsympathetic) portrait of the Duke and Duchess of Windsor....

... and his study of a gloomy-looking Sunday morning speaker at Hyde Park Corner...

A few photos seem a tad too obviously staged, such as this one of Joanna Lumley (as, I assume, Purdy in The New Avengers) but even here Lichfield creates a fantastic effect with the sunlight through the leaves of the tree...

...while this portrait of Dirk Bogarde (glimpsed, smoking, through a haze of wine-bottles) seems more candid than knowing...

Two of my favourite images from this exhibition are a Gurkha soldier standing sentry duty outside St James's Palace in the snow....

....and Lichfield's snap of Elizabeth Taylor snapping Elizabeth the Queen Mother at a Garden Party. It is, I think, the world-weary look on the face of the passing waitress that makes it such a fantastic shot...

The exhibition, Patrick Lichfield: Perceptions can be viewed until 7 January 2011 at

Chris Beetles Fine Photographs, 3-5 Swallow Street, London, W1B 4DE, Tel: 020 7434 4319

Gallery opening times: Monday-Saturday, 10:00-17:30

"STOP THE FRAME I WANT TO GET OUT!"

2011-12-12T00:01:00.001Z

I've always loved stop-motion animation and this film - Sorry, I'm Late by blink - is a mini-masterpiece...

Like all animation, stop-motion is a hellishly time-consuming process. If you're as intrigued as I was by how it was done, visit blink's website to see making of photos and videos.

And thanks to Irascible Ian for telling me about Sorry, I'm Late.

...AS A DOOR-NAIL!

2011-12-09T00:05:00.015Z

Another thing I love about Dickens, is his profligate use of parenthetical observations: the digressions and asides that are so much a part of his conversational style.

Take the beginning of The Chimes. Five words in on his opening sentence, Dickens sets off on a sixty-three word long parenthesis as can be seen in this colour-coded extract:

There are not many people – and as it is desirable that a story-teller and a story-reader should establish a mutual understanding as soon as possible, I beg it to be noticed that I confine this observation neither to young people nor to little people, but extend it to all conditions of people: little and big, young and old: yet growing up, or already growing down again – there are not, I say, many people who would care to sleep in a church.

Similarly, on the opening page of A Christmas Carol:

Old Marley was as dead as a door-nail. Mind! I don't mean to say that I know, of my own knowledge, what there is particularly dead about a door-nail. I might have been inclined, myself, to regard a coffin-nail as the deadest piece of ironmongery in the trade. But the wisdom of our ancestors is in the simile; and my unhallowed hands shall not disturb it, or the Country's done for. You will therefore permit me to repeat, emphatically, that Marley was as dead as a door-nail.

Incidentally, Dickens was correct in identifying the phrase 'as dead as a door-nail' as being one of great antiquity. One of several earliest uses of the expression (and the only one of a known date) is in William Langland's The Vision of Piers Plowman, written inn 1362: "Fey withouten fait is febelore þen nouȝt, And ded as a dore-nayl."

Shakespeare puts the phrase in Jack Cade's mouth in his 1592 play, King Henry VI, Part 2:

Brave thee! ay, by the best blood that ever was
broached, and beard thee too. Look on me well: I
have eat no meat these five days; yet, come thou and
thy five men, and if I do not leave you all as dead
as a doornail, I pray God I may never eat grass more.

But why, as Dickens asks, are door-nails deader than say a coffin-nail? Maybe, as one on-line source suggest:

Door-nails are the large-headed studs that were used in earlier times for strength and more recently as decoration. The practice was to hammer the nail through and then bend over the protruding end to secure it. This process, similar to riveting, was called clenching. This may be the source of the 'deadness', as such a nail would be unusable afterwards.

Anyway, if you want to find out just how dead Marley was – and what happened as a result – there are still tickets available (heaven only knows why!) for A Christmas Carol and the Conjuror, a seasonal entertainment by David Weeks and myself that combines Dickens' 1858 Public Reading version of the saga of Ebenezer Scrooge with amazing magical interludes. The event is being held at the British Library Conference Centre, tonight at 6:30 and tomorrow, Saturday, at 2:30.

Our event was inspired by the British Library's new exhibition, A Hankering After Ghosts: Charles Dickens and the Supernatural.

The exhibition which is on display in the British Library's Folio Society Gallery until 4 March, 2012 as part of the Dickens bicentennial celebrations, explores the many ways in which Dickens used supernatural phenomena in his works, while placing them in the context of scientific, technological and philosophical debates of his time.

Dickens’ interest in the macabre was apparent from an early age. As an adult he was caught up in ‘mesmeric mania’ that swept Britain and developed an interest in the ‘power of the human mind’. He believed that all supernatural manifestations must have rational explanations, but his investigations into animal magnetism and psychology showed him that science could be as chilling as any ghost story. As a result he became wonderfully adept at suspending readers between psychological and supernatural explanations in his fiction.

Which brings us back to the dead Mr Marley...

Images: 'The Spirits of the Bells' by Daniel Maclise from The Chimes (1844); 'Dickens' Dream' by Robert William Buss; and the appearance of Marley's ghost in Scrooge's knocker in A Christmas Carol as seen by Arthur Rackham (1915)

"TO BEGIN WITH..."

2011-12-06T08:34:00.010Z

Studying the text (once again) of Charles Dickens' famous "ghost story of Christmas" in preparation for David and my performance of A Christmas Carol and the Conjuror at the British Library Conference Centre (Friday 9 December at 6:30 and Saturday 10 December at 2:30), I have been marvelling anew at Dickens' daring and bravado!

Consider the opening of A Christmas Carol:

"Marley was dead: to begin with."

That's how Dickens begins the story.

The sentence has become so familiar to us that it's easy to overlook just how bold an opening that is!

Marley?

Who is Marley?

And doesn't it sound as if we are joining a conversation that started a few moments before we opened the book? A conversation that might have gone something like...

"I'm going to tell you a remarkable story!"

"Oh, what's so remarkable about it?"

"Well, you see, the thing is Marley was dead: to begin with..."

Not only that, but as you read the opening sentence, paragraph and page you discover that this character who is introduced without any introduction is not only dead but is also not the story's chief protagonist, that honour going to Marley's "sole administrator, his sole assign, his sole residuary legatee, his sole friend, his sole mourner", Mr Ebenezer Scrooge!

Dickens' used the same 'mid-conversation' style in a couple of his later 'Christmas Books'. Consider, for example, the opening of A Cricket on the Hearth:

The kettle began it!

Don't tell me what Mrs. Peerybingle said. I know better. Mrs. Peerybingle may leave it on record to the end of time that she couldn't say which of them began it; but, I say the kettle did. I ought to know, I hope! The kettle began it, full five minutes by the little waxy-faced Dutch clock in the corner, before the Cricket uttered a chirp.

"The kettle began it?' Began what? We are instantly intrigued!

Similarly, there is the audacious opening of The Haunted Man:

Everybody said so.

Far be it from me to assert that what everybody says must be true. Everybody is, often, as likely to be wrong as right. In the general experience, everybody has been wrong so often, and it has taken, in most instances, such a weary while to find out how wrong, that the authority is proved to be fallible. Everybody may sometimes be right; "but THAT'S no rule," as the ghost of Giles Scroggins says in the ballad.

The dread word, GHOST, recalls me.

Everybody said he looked like a haunted man. The extent of my present claim for everybody is, that they were so far right. He did.

"Everybody said so."

Everybody said WHAT? About WHO?

It is literary tricks like this that make Dickens such a ruddy genius...

There we are in the noisy, overcrowded room of of Life, merrily (or, possibly, angrily) nattering away to others and taking no particular notice of what Mr Dickens is saying in the corner over there, until, all of a sudden (in a momentary lull in the conversation) we catch hold of a phrase – "Everybody said so..." or "The kettle began it..." or, perhaps, "Marley was dead: to begin with..." and we have absolutely no choice but to stop whatever we are saying or doing and listen to the story he has to tell us!

You can still book tickets for A Christmas Carol and the Conjuror here.

And...

DON'T MISS! The new British Library exhibition, A Hankering After Ghosts: Charles Dickens and the Supernatural which is on show in the Folio Society Gallery until 4 March, 2012.

Images: Scrooge and the Three Spirits by Sol Eytinge; 'The Magician Dickens Invoking the Spirit of Father Christmas' by Kyd (Jospeh Clayton Clarke) from a 1905 edition of The Dickensian.

DISNEY DAY

2011-12-05T00:01:00.003Z

Today is the 110th birthday of Walter Elias (better known as Walt) Disney...

Last Saturday, I should have been in Manchester with my good friend Robin Allan, author of the wonderfully illuminating Walt Disney and Europe, for 'A Day of Disney' to celebrate the memory of one of the most compelling legacies in worldwide popular culture. With all the 'stuff' life is currently chucking at us, I sadly missed this event which Robin and I launched together many years ago.

So, belatedly for Robin, and for Uncle Walt on the actual date that commemorates his birth in 1901, here's an appropriate birthday greeting...

Caricature of Walt Disney by Vizcarra.

A GLIMMER FROM THE PAST

2011-12-04T00:01:00.004Z

It's amazing what turns up on YouTube every now and again: such as lost moments of TV that you thought you'd never see again. The other day, I stumbled over myself – well, that is, the me I used to be a decade or two ago! – hosting the BBC TV's then Sunday morning God-slot, First Light.

There's mercifully little of me in this clip: basically just the opening to the programme and my introduction to Adrian Snell and Friends' performance of 'By the Waterfront', an appropriate number for a Sunday morning...

Seeing this snippet of my brief-ish TV career, brought back a lot of memories of working at the BBC studios in Manchester and of being totally thrown in at the deep end of television presentation: learning, amongst other skills, to read auto-cues and take direction via an earpiece... Of course, in those days, I was still young enough to believe I could do anything and never once batted an eye-lid at tackling something new... Nowadays, I'd be a tad more reticent!

Having been told, two days ago, by The Church Next Door (in a outburst of pre-Christmas spirit) that we have to vacate our flat by 27 January, I rather wish I was still presenting a religious current affairs programme!

As a result of the imminent upheaval caused by having to move our joint 60 years of possessions (or, I guess, that should be 120 years) – out, into storage and possibly – at some point in the future, as yet unknown – back in again, is likely to curtail much serious (or even trivial) blogging for a while; but if and when I disappear from view, rest assured I will, eventually, return!

MANY MAGICAL RETURNS

2011-12-02T00:01:00.003Z

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAVID!

OK, no time for celebrations - let's get on with rehearsing next week's A Christmas Carol and the Conjuror event at the British Library!

ONE OF A KIND

2011-11-28T14:17:00.009Z

KEN RUSSELL
1927-2011

Maverick filmmaker Ken Russell has died at 84: a grand age for one who was the enfant terrible of 'sixties cinema.

Maligned, misunderstood and hugely undervalued, Russell was a great director: a man of extraordinary visions – brave, brash, startling, shocking, horrifying and hilarious by turn – he leaves a legacy that is greatly in need of critical reevaluation and public restoration.

Here is an excellent short documentary On Ken Russell by Matthew Supersad.

And here's a piece I wrote on this blog back in 2007 in praise of Mr Russell and the exhibition of photographs he had just staged: Ken's Candid Camera.

Portrait of Ken Russell by Paul Joyce.

ANTICIPATION

2011-11-27T11:02:00.006Z

Today is the first Sunday in Advent...

In case you are wondering what Advent means, here's the definition...

Today is, therefore, a good day on which to announce – should you have missed the fact – that, in an effort to encourage those whose visits to church tend to be limited to Christenings, weddings, funerals and (possibly) Christmas Eve Mass, the good ol' Church of England has launched a new on-line facility to help you Find a Church Near You.

Another good way is to walk down a few streets until you see a building with either a tower of a steeple (tall pointy thing) which are sometimes (but not always) churches. There are other churches that look a bit like council offices but they usually have the word 'CHURCH' displayed somewhere on or near the exterior.

I checked out the C of E's new service (pun intended) – inserted my postcode and clicked – and found that I am actually living NEXT to a church!

That, of course, I knew; I was hoping it might tell me there was a nearby church with whom we weren't haggling over possible tenancy terms and where I would feel comfortable attending... Oh, well, ho-hum...

Never mind, it is Advent and that means that Christmas is coming!

"DEAR MR STOKOWSKI..."

2011-11-25T00:01:00.005Z

Sorting through more treasures for boxing-up, I stumbled on a photograph that brought back a flood of memories...

It was 1977 and Fantasia, that Disney film that has been such an obsession of mine for so much of my life, was once more being re-released – this time with a simulated stereo soundtrack.

Swept away yet again by the amazing combination of great music and amazing animation that had done so much not only to secure my passionate devotion to Disney but also to introduce me to classical music, I sat down and wrote a fan letter to the film's maestro, Leopold Stokowski.

Not knowing where to send it, I wrote care of the Disney Studio, an unnecessarily circuitous route as it happened, since by then he was living in Hampshire, England!

Months passed without a reply. Then, in September 1977, I read of Stokowski's death at the age of 95. I had waited too long; had written to my hero too late.

But no, that was not the case: the very next day, I received in the post what must have been one of the last photographs the conductor ever signed...

The 'W' shaped squiggle at the end of the signature represents a lyre and was a characteristic flourish with which Stokowski finished many of his autographs.

BEAR NECESSITIES

2011-11-22T00:01:00.004Z

A few days ago I mentioned The Illustrators 1837-2011 exhibition at Chris Beetles' Art Gallery and showed some of the pen-and-ink pictures that are on sale.

There are many items for sale after which I lust, but none more so than a series of watercolour paintings created by Alfred Bestall for the covers and end-papers of those best-selling, dearly-loved Christmas stocking-fillers, the Rupert Annuals.

Bestall's evocative depiction of Rupert's adventurous realm of magical characters, creatures and happenings are unequaled for their innocent charm, their captured energy and their haunting atmosphere of dreamy other-worldliness.

They possess – or, at least, evoke within me – a sense of yearning, a deep-seated longing for the safe, secure happiness of the days of my youth: when the future still stretched limitlessly before me filled with unquestioned hopefulness...

Should it happen, by some generous quirk of fate, that I were to find myself trousering the Lotto rollover this week, I will be purchasing at least one and possibly several of these gems – if, of course, they haven't all been snapped up!

You can view the exhibition on-line here

MAGIC & HUMBUG

2011-11-19T00:01:00.002Z

Charles Dickens was a conjuror: he produced unforgettable characters and scenes out of thin air and made them an indelible part of national – and world – culture; but he was also a keen amateur magician who amazed his literary friends with his acts of legerdemain.

Dickens has now become inseparably associated with the Christmas season – largely as a result of that 1843 ghost-story-with-a-moral, A Christmas Carol, and the other Christmas Books that followed.

The story of the tight-fisted Ebenezer Scrooge, Marley's Ghost, Bob Cratchit and Tiny Tim and the Spirits of Christmas Past, Present and Yet To Come has been told and re-told to a point when it has ceased to be a literary phenomenon and has assumed a mythic status.

With the success of what Dickens called his little "Ghost Story of Christmas", the Victorian theatre – where ghosts were being regularly being conjured as an ingredient of plays and programmes of entertainment – began calling up Scrooge's spectral visitors with the aid of the cutting-edge special effects technology of their age.

This December the British Library celebrates the author's particular fascination with ghostliness and spookery in an exhibition, A Hankering after Ghosts: Charles Dickens and the Supernatural.

To coincide with the event, David and I are presenting a couple of performances of A Christmas Carol and the Conjuror: a divertissement combining a reading by me of Dickens' famous text – as abridged and performed by the author in his Public Readings of 1858 – interspersed with magical interludes from David featuring a cavalcade of mystifying tricks inspired by Scrooge's saga.

Performances are on Friday 9 December 2011 at 6:30 and Saturday 10 December at 2:30.

Don't be a HUMBUG: BOOK NOW!

Portrait of Dickens by Scala

A PEAKE INTO WONDERLAND

2011-11-16T14:17:00.011Z

...and through the Looking-Glass!

An Invitation!

On Friday evening the Lewis Carroll Society will be meeting at The Art Workers Guild, 6 Queen Square, London, WC1N 3AT for From Gormenghast to Wonderland, an event to mark the centenary of Mervyn Peake, whose many accomplishments included providing memorable illustrations for Carroll's two Alice books and The Hunting of the Snark.

The artist's sons, Sebastian and Fabian Peake will be reflecting on the life and legacy of their father and I will be talking about Peake's highly individual perspective on the worlds down the rabbit-hole and beyond the looking-glass.

Doors open at 6:45 for 7:15, the event is free to members of the Lewis Carroll Society but is open to non-members for an admission charge of £8:00. Enquiries and bookings to Mark Richards on 020 7286 0776 or by e-mail: markrichards@aznet.co.uk

Don't sit at home all alone...

...come and join us!

Details of how to get to The Art Workers Guild can be found here.

Images: © The Estate of Mervyn Peake

GIVE AND TAKE

2011-11-15T00:37:00.004Z

If we really MUST have Christmas commercials in November, I could wish they were all as good as this one...

And here's the 'Making of' video...

DRAWING THE LINE

2011-11-13T00:01:00.003Z

It is almost time for that much-loved illustrative feast: the annual selling exhibition at Chris Beetle's Art Gallery celebrating the British Art of Illustration.

There are hundreds of examples of that art as practiced by some of the greatest names from John Tenniel and George Cruikshank via the Heath Robinson family to Ronald Searle and Quentin Blake.

There are many pieces on show featuring colour illustrations, but – as a taster – here are a few examples of the work of artists who were among the undisputed masters of black and white...

Edward Ardizzone

Rowland Emett

Eric Fraser

Joan Hassall

Thomas Heath Robinson

William Heath Robinson

Ronald Searle

Tommy Cooper and Shirley Bassey

E H Shepard

R S Sheriffs

Gladys Cooper and Margaret O'Brien in The Secret Garden

The full catalogue can be viewed on-line here or purchased as a superbly produced 384 page paperback that can be ordered here

The Illustrators exhibition runs from 20 November 2010 to 8 January 2011, opening hours: Monday-Saturday 10:00-17:30.

Chris Beetle's Gallery is at 8 & 10 Ryder St, St James's, London SW1Y 6QB (Telephone: 020 7839 7551; Fax: 020 7839 1603; e-mail: gallery@chrisbeetles.com)

WE WILL REMEMBER THEM

2011-11-11T11:00:00.000Z

OPTIMAL EFFECT

2011-11-10T00:01:00.002Z

3D it seems (at least for the immediate future) is here to stay. Modern technology has made it possible for the third-dimension to be so much more than mere gimmickry: to give cinematic experience an immersive, sensory quality that is a far cry from the poke-in-the-eye of early 3D!

And when it is used simply showing off (though, the technology is, of course, far from simple!) it can be done with a showmanship previously unimagined.

If you missed seeing the video below when it circulated last year, it is well worth five minutes of your time...

On 5 September 2010, LG Electronics (LG) unveiled a gigantic media façade in Kulturbrauerei, the cultural heart of Berlin, displaying 3D mapping technology to highlight the company's new smartphone, the LG Optimus One.

The presentation was, as you will see, a source of considerable (and not surprising) wonderment for the many people passing through the square, who were visually overwhelmed by the ever-changing 3D-style artwork on the nearly three-storey high screen.

Beginning with a countdown on a giant hourglass and a greeting from an “Android,” LG’s huge presentation took viewers on an amazing 3D-effects ride that is spectacular even in common-or-garden 2D...

It's impossible not to think that this will be the look of the advertising hoardings of the late 21st Century.

LINES AND SQUARES

2011-11-08T00:01:00.004Z

On a nearby building-site – in an attempt to make the place look more attractive than building-sites usually look – colourful hoardings were erected and were specially graffitied with helpful suggestions on how to brighten up our otherwise hum-drum Kennington lives.

For example, why not...

Or, again, you could...

But, whatever we do, we were reminded, we absolutely MUST remember...

I wonder exactly when it was decided that one ought NOT to walk on the lines on the street?

Certainly if it wasn't down to A A Milne, he (with his penchant for bears) at least made it something of which every reader of When We Were Very Young became acutely aware through this little verse...

Whenever I walk in a London street,
I'm ever so careful to watch my feet;
And I keep in the squares,
And the masses of bears,
Who wait at the corners all ready to eat
The sillies who tread on the lines of the street,
Go back to their lairs,
And I say to them, "Bears,
just look how I'm walking in all the squares!"

And the little bears growl to each other, "He's mine,
As soon as he's silly and steps on a line."
And some of the bigger bears try to pretend
That they came round the corner to look for a friend;
And they try to pretend that nobody cares
Whether you walk on the lines or squares.
But only the sillies believe the talk;
It's ever so portant how you walk.
And it's ever so jolly to call out, "Bears,
just watch me walking in all the squares!"

A few hours after posting innocent piece of flummery above, I was driven by my insatiable curiosity (and readers of Kipling will recall where insatiable curiosity inevitably leads) to start trawling the net in search of a pre-Milnean origin for Linesofthestreetphobia!

The result was both illuminating and shocking according to CSI the website of the magazine Skeptical Enquiry.

Here (in their uncensored words) is the alleged origin of Christopher Robin's innocent bear-avoidance game:

Ill-fortune is said to be the result from stepping on a crack in the pavement. Present day society usually associates the superstition behind treading on cracks to the rhyme: "Step on a crack, break your mother's back" but the superstition actually goes back to the late 19th - early 20th Century and the racism that was prevalent in this period.
The original rhyming verse is thought to be "Step on a crack and your mother will turn black." It was also common to think that walking on the lines in pavement would mean you would marry a negro and have a black baby. (Apparently this superstition only applied to Caucasians and because of the rampant prejudice against black people, was considered an activity to avoid.)

Stepping on cracks also had significance for children. In the mid-20th Century it was popular to tell children that if they stepped on the cracks in the street, they would be eaten by the bears that congregate on street corners waiting for their lunch to walk by. [Appallingly, no credit given to Mr Milne here! Ed]

Also, the number of lines a person would walk on corresponded with the number of china dishes that the person would break, later in the day.

Only in the last few decades has the rhyming superstition resurfaced to be the recognized "step on a crack, break your mother's back" and in some areas, two superstitions above are melded together to include the number of lines one steps on will correspond with the number of your mother's bones that are broken.

Original illustrations to When We Were Very Young (1924) by Ernest H Shepard

PEAKE EXPLORATION

2011-11-06T00:20:00.010Z

Tomorrow (Monday) night:

MERVYN PEAKE:
A CENTENARY TRIBUTE

I will be in conversation with Sebastian and Fabian Peake as they reminisce about their father's life and work and read from his poetry and short stories in the special centenary event at King's Place, the impressive new art and music centre just a few minutes walk from King's Cross Station.

The event begins at 7:00 pm, tickets cost £9.50 and can be booked on-line here.

MONSTROUS BAGGAGE

2011-11-03T00:01:00.002Z

There seem to have been a lot of Hallowe'en parties last weekend – on Saturday night we were passed by a car carrying Frankenstein's Monster and the Wolfman and I was slightly surprised to see a six-foot banana waiting at a bus stop – and, goodness knows, things don't get much scarier than that!

Anyway, for the next occasion on which such invites come your way, let me recommend these stylishly grisly accessories which I spotted in (of all unlikely places) the sleepy seaside town of Hastings...

On reflection, I might get one of the bottom bags as a carry-on – just in case I ever have to travel though Los Angeles airport again!

Monstrous bags and other Goth delights are available from Equilibrium, 55 George Street, Hastings, East Sussex TN34 3EE Tel: 01424 200116

DEVILISH DIALOGUE

2011-10-31T00:01:00.011Z

It's HALLOWEEN!

...and, since 31 October is, by custom, a time for trick-or-treating, here is a little tricky-treat from me to you: a piece of vintage Sibley radio, first broadcast on BBC Radio 3 thirty-two years ago on Halloween night 1979.

Talk of the Devil is an anthology of prose and poetry which I compiled in commemoration of the life and times (and heinous works) of Lucifer, Prince of Darkness.

The readers were Judy Parfitt, Robert Eddison (both of whom later appeared in my first Gormenghast dramatisation) and Brian Carroll and the programme was produced by veteran drama director, Graham Gauld...

Images of His Infernalness by Goya and Dore

TITUS REPRISED

2011-10-29T00:01:00.005+01:00

As if you hadn't read enough about my recent radio dramatisations, The History of Titus Groan, based on the novels of Mervyn Peake, here I am mentioning it again, although only because those nice people at BBC Radio4Extra are repeating it in two three-hour chunks today and tomorrow as part of a pre-Halloween Gothic weekend.

I would argue that Peake isn't really Gothic, but I am, nevertheless, intrigued to know how it plays at length and with an overnight pause half-way through the second book...

Anyway, here's the schedule of broadcasts...

The first episode is preceded (at 19:30 tonight) by the superb documentary, 100 Years of Mervyn Peake, presented by Sebastian Peake with contributions from his siblings, Fabian and Clare as well as the wonderful Joanna Harris and myself.

If you're looking for Radio4Extra (formerly known as Radio 7), this is where you can find it:
Frequency DAB: 12B / Freeview: 708 / Freesat: 708 / Sky: 0131 / Virgin Media: 910 / TalkTalk TV: 633 / UPC Ireland: 929

FEAR & LOATHING IN LOS ANGELES

2011-10-27T14:30:00.008+01:00

To travel from Wellington in New Zealand to London involves twenty-four hours flying-time, plus several more in check-ins, departures, transfers and arrivals. Door-to-door for me, this time, it totalled-out at thirty-two hours which is, frankly, pretty tiring even without the chronic disruption to the body-clock.

What I, and my fellow passengers on yesterday's Air New Zealand flight NZ4, didn't need was what befell us on our arrival in Los Angeles...

At the start of our journey we had passed through security: we and our bags and baggage had been x-rayed and checked. The normal procedure when the plane arrives in LA is for passengers travelling on to another destination to be held in a transit lounge where they are checked by US security (by scanning retinas and fingers-and-thumbs profiles) and where they then remain for the, roughly, one hour it takes to clean, refuel and re-crew the plane.

Not so this trip...

Because NZ4 was an addition to the usual Air New Zealand flying schedule (necessitated by the number of returning Rugby World Cup spectators) it seemingly triggered some security alarm bell with the US air control. This is, frankly, weird since no flights can begin without their arrival being approved by the destination airport.

Anyway, five minutes before landing the air crew were notified that the transit lounge would not be used and we would all have to pass through security and customs and the re-enter as newly departing travellers.

For the next two hours we queued to be processed as arrivals (along, of course, with all the passengers who really were actually arriving in LA as opposed to just passing through) and then forced to leave the airport and then re-enter at departures and, of course, undergo the full check-in procedure with all those waiting to depart on various flights.

I smiled wryly at the notice assuring me that the US welcomed me and promised to treat me with dignity and respect as we "tired, poor, huddled masses" were herded along like recalcitrant cattle, scrutinised like potential terrorists, had our bodies x-rayed and searched and our carry-on luggage gone through item by item before we were allowed to, finally, re-board our plane for London.

Sadly, not everyone made it back in time and at least two passengers who got snarled up somewhere in LA's security bottleneck had their cases unloaded and were left behind.

I understand, endorse and applaud the need for rigorous security and vigilance – why would I not? I want to know that I am travelling in safety – but this was nothing short of petty-fogging bureaucracy that made unnecessary work for rafts of, doubtless overworked, officials and caused unwarranted discomfort and delay for at least one 707-load of passengers.

We were held up by a further 30-minutes due to Air Force One arriving or taking off (no aircraft can share immediate airspace with the Presidential plane) and whilst I didn't notice Mr Obama in the security queue, it is probably just as well because – despite the 'special relationship' – I'd have, undoubtedly, given him a piece of my mind...

WELLINGTON ARTY-FACTS (3)

2011-10-22T20:36:00.012+01:00

My final (for now) posting on some of Wellington's public artworks - as photographed during one of my earlier visits to this unique city.

Firstly...

An anonymous street mural...

Paul Dibble's 'Fruits of the Garden' overlooking the Harbour...

Part of the 'City to Sea' bridge by Paratene Matchitt, Rewi Thompson and John Grey...

'Shells' by Jeff Thomson, which stands on the corner off Hunter Street and Lambton Quay...

And lastly, Phil Price's kinetic sculpture, 'Protoplasm', which is constantly oscillating – like a fleet of miniature UFOs – above the corner of Hunter Street and Lambton Quay...

WELLINGTON ARTY-FACTS (2)

2011-10-20T09:31:00.004+01:00

Here's another of Wellington's public art works: it's by May Louise Brown and is called 'Seven Steps to Heaven'...

WELLINGTON ARTY-FACTS (1)

2011-10-16T03:36:00.015+01:00

Unable to use iPad to upload any of the many photos I've (not) taken, I thought I'd post a few very old photos, from my first-ever visit to New Zealand in 2001, showing examples of Wellington's wonderful public artworks, beginning with Neil Dawson's impressive, yet amazingly delicate, 'Ferns': a 3.4 metre diameter sphere suspended 14 metres above Civic Square in central Wellington.

Exquisite AND quirky! Brilliant!

Sorry the images aren't centrally aligned (in line with my usually fastidious house style) but – guess what? – iPad doesn't let you make those kind of adjustments...

Later rectified!

MISHAPS IN MIDDLE-EARTH

2011-10-14T16:49:00.005+01:00

Phew!!

What a week: I set off last Saturday on what proved to be (with check-in, in-transit and check-out times) a 30+ hour long journey from my London Bag End to the Wellington equivalent of the Lonely Mountain!

Then came the attack of my personal Smaug in the form of a nasty infection of the skin tissue in the left leg (cellulitus) probably triggered by the trauma from a rather nasty fall I took in London before I left...

In between meeting the brilliant artisans of Middle-earth (and encountering a baker's dozen of dwarves) I've been spending time worrying about my painfully swollen while sitting in doctor's surgeries, hospital waiting rooms and late-night pharmacies!

Mega-doses of antibiotics seem to be (to use a leg-orientated simile) 'kicking-in' at last and I am desperate to get myself feeling better, more mobile and focusing on the task of gathering information about the adventures of Mr Bilbo Baggins on his journey through Jacksonland, rather than on my personal status as one of Hobbiton's walking wounded!

So, what can I tell you of the wonders, miracles and delights that I have glimpsed over-hill and under-hill? Sadly, having signed a non-disclosure document – that gives Warner Bros more control over my immortal soul than Mephitopheles had over Dr Faustus –– I can tell you absolutely NOTHING! Other than that it's all looking pretty darn fantastic.

The newly acquired iPad has not (so far) yeilded all its promised potential and I'm incredibly frustrated to find that I can't upload photos to Blogger or flickr which is why this post is, uncharacteristically, lacking in illustrative embellishment!

Never mind, down here, I've two days of taking it easy while my host nation anticipates – with a mixture of elation and anxiety – Sunday's Rugby World Cup semi-final between NZ and Oz. Monday will either be a day of jubilation or deepest mourning!

By the way, I know it says 'Friday' on the top of this post but, down here, it's already Saturday. I could try to work out how to change the Time Zone setting on my Blogger account, but with iPad holding out on me, I'd probably end up losing the post or even deleting the blog!

THERE AND BACK AGAIN

2011-10-07T00:01:00.009+01:00

Back in 2001, I had the great good fortune to fly to the Cannes Film Festival to witness the debut screening of the first few minutes of the highly anticipated footage from Peter Jackson's The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring.

One of the souvenirs of this event (which recently came to light in our fitfully-conducted clear-and-pack-to-move process) was a clay LOTR pipe and a leather pouch of – now rather dry – pipe-weed: possibly Old Toby but, more likely, Longbottom Leaf...

That was ten years ago; later I made three trips to Wellington, New Zealand, to write about the making of that film and its sequels – along with a life of the Ring-Master, Peter Jackson.

Tomorrow, I will be heading off there again, this time to research the first of two books on the making of the double-film prequel, The Hobbit.

Can't wait to visit Bag End again! Just hope Bilbo's got a couple of bottles of Old Winyards laid down...

CARS FOR THE BARD

2011-10-06T00:01:00.002+01:00

Possibly the last word on personalised number-plates but then maybe not...

Without doubt the most entertaining examples we have ever come across live (when not driving around the metropolis) outside a house on Chelsea embankment. I can't find my own photos of these Shakespearean plates, so am recycling one from the net because it's a joke that just can't wait!

Yes! That probably is the question the owners ask each other whenever it's time to pop down the shops...

PETS ON PLATES

2011-10-05T00:01:00.001+01:00

Still talking about personalised number-plates...

This pair of engaging number-plates turned up on the net the other day and, needless to say, my friend buttons was very keen for us to get the vehicle on the right...

ODD COUPLE

2011-10-04T00:01:00.003+01:00

David and I celebrate the fourth anniversary of our Civil Partnership today – although, in total, we have been together now for 21 years!

I recently stumbled on a numerology-based compatibility test. A bit late to start running tests on a relationship that's been going for over two decades, you might say, but the results were interesting.

Anyone who knows us, will have a view on just how accurate it is...

Compatibility level: 100% - A natural fit that usually produces a very compatible relationship.

David is drawn to Brian, in part, because Brian has great inner strength and the kind of personal power that reveals the possibility of worldly success. Capable and goal-oriented, Brian is a force to be reckoned with.

Brian is attracted to David largely because Brian recognizes in David an emotional and spiritual wealth that may well have remained, at least to some extent, dormant in the life of Brian. David lives and experiences life on many levels. David knows the heart and the power of emotions.

When David and Brian are brought together, individual innate qualities can produce quite a balanced relationship. This is a combination with potential to survive for years and years.

However, an important detail they both must be attentive to is that the relation between them is often based on illusions, and when such illusions fall apart, the relationship may crash.

David sees strength, and thinks it will always be there. Brian sees romance and the subtle powers of the heart, and thinks it will last forever. Neither does, of course. Strength eventually dissipates. The heart slowly loses interest. However, that does not mean this relationship does not stand a chance. It certainly does. And the key to make it a pleasant, long lasting relationship is to recognize each other for what they are, beyond the obvious.

David must learn to love not only Brian's strength and capabilities but also Brian's weaknesses. It is important that David can love Brian as a whole human being. And Brian, in turn, must learn to love not only the romantic presence, the passion of the heart Brian craves in David, but David as a whole human being.

Few combinations tend to give birth to relationships based on illusions as often as do these two. But David and Brian must not forget that they both have many other qualities to be brought to the surface, exercised and explored to their mutual benefit. They just need to keep that in mind, to unite their respective strengths and move on to turn theirs into a most pleasant, rewarding, and long-lasting relationship.

So, watch this space...

Meanwhile--

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, DAVID,
AND THANKS FOR EVERYTHING!

ANONYMITY FOR WHAT?

2011-09-29T00:01:00.001+01:00

Talking of personalised number-plates....

The other day in Bury Street, Mayfair, two posh cars were parked one behind the other. There was this Jaguar...

For what remains unsure - suggestions, please!

The other vehicle was a Bentley bearing the number-plate...

Maybe the choice of 'ANON' derives from the definition 'straight away; at once'. Otherwise it must be an abbreviation of 'anonymous', which would, surely, be just a tad self-consciously pretentious...?

Photos: David Weeks

MEANWHILE...

2011-09-28T00:01:00.002+01:00

Out here: the moon still rises behind the mountains...

But, sadly, when it rises tonight, we will be back in London...

MEANWHILE...

2011-09-25T00:01:00.001+01:00

Out here: the sun still sets behind the church...

MEANWHILE....

2011-09-22T00:01:00.002+01:00

Out here: sun-worshippers worship...

MEANWHILE...

2011-09-19T00:01:00.001+01:00

Out here: the little red boat is still safely moored...

MEANWHILE...

2011-09-17T00:01:00.000+01:00

Out here: David continues to unwind...

MEANWHILE...

2011-09-15T00:01:00.000+01:00

Out here: Priests fish off the end of the jetty...

MEANWHILE...

2011-09-13T00:01:00.002+01:00

Out here: kids are jumping off the front of fishing-boats...

LEST WE FORGET

2011-09-11T00:01:00.002+01:00

MEANWHILE...

2011-09-09T00:01:00.000+01:00

Out here: grapes are ripening on the vine...

IN SEARCH OF THE SUN...

2011-09-07T00:01:00.001+01:00

Blogs will be less frequent for a week or two as we seek to bring a little sun-and-sea healing into our lives: David after his double-hernia op, and me after... well... the ongoing struggles with arthritis...

By the time you read this we will be en route for our favoured sun-spot: the tiny resort of Emporios at the far end of the Greek island of Kalymnos...

Occasional, brief, reports will emanate from time to time...

HISTORY FOR KEEPS

2011-09-06T00:40:00.009+01:00

If you enjoyed my recent cycle of radio plays, The History of Titus Groan, based on the books by Mervyn Peake and would like to own it for keeps – or if you missed any or all of the six one-hour episodes – you may like to know that it is now available for purchase and download from AudibleGo – and for just £6.74!

The production features a stellar cast headed by Miranda Richardson, Paul Rhys, James Fleet, Tamsin Greig, William Gaunt and Carl Prekopp with David Warner as the Artist and Luke Treadaway as Titus Groan, 77th Earl of Gormenghast.

ORDER HERE!

THE WORKING WEAK

2011-09-05T00:01:00.002+01:00

Here's our friend, folk singer Michael Grosvenor Myer with a comforting thought with which to begin the next seven days...

You'll find more folk songs on Michael's YouTube Channel

PLUMB CRAZY

2011-09-03T00:01:00.003+01:00

The other week, magicians in The Magic Circle were being circulated with an offer to buy a unique vehicle number-plate for a mere £5, 500...

But perhaps the most dedicated collectors of 'personalised' number-plates I've ever come across is the company, Pimlico Plumbers.

Crossing Vauxhall Bridge one night, we noticed a van ahead of us...

...with an interesting number-plate...

Ever since, we've been spotting other Pimlico Plumbers vans with similarly idiosyncratic plates...

And one of the best – LOO 2 WET...

There are, apparently dozens more that we''ve not spotted yet, such as:

W4TER
7O1LET
C15TEN
8ATH
DRA1N
B1DET
TAP I5 ON
A LE4K
LOO 2 OLD
TAP S7OP

I think I'm going to start an I-Spy Book of Pimlico Plumbers Number-plates and try to collect them all!

Here's the full roll – bog-roll would be better! – of their impressive collection. And if you own a likely contender for the list, they may well be in the market to buy!

THEME AND VARIATIONS

2011-09-01T00:01:00.006+01:00

In case you missed it (most people have!) I have launched a new blog...

...so far fourteen favourite photos of my favourite city and the people who live there, but many more to come!

Check out Venice Variations.

THE KING OF JESTERS

2011-08-29T00:01:00.007+01:00

For any early-day readers of this blog I was rather caught (literally) napping by blogger when a part-completed post was 'published' instead of being 'saved'!

SO! What I was going to say was that the best bit of this Bank Holiday weekend for me was Friday night with a take-away Chinese meal watching one of my top ten favourite films, Danny Kaye's 1956 Hollywood hybrid – part-musical, part-romantic-comedy, part-swashbuckler – The Court Jester!

It is impossible – IM-POSSIBLE – to watch this film and not feel cheerier than you were before the Paramount Mountain gives way to the VistaVision logo and the tirelessly versatile Kaye comes dancing onto the screen in motley, reacting to the rolling credits of his distinguished co-stars: Glynis Johns, Angela Lansbury, Cecil Parker, Alan Napier, Mildred Natwick and, in particular, Basil Rathbone who plays Kaye's nemesis in the film and whose name menacingly returns again and again in an evil-looking type-face!

The plot is simplicity itself: Kaye plays Hubert Hawkins, a former troubadour, now part of a band of woodland outlaws, headed by the Robin Hood-like Black Fox, fighting to overthrow the usurping tyrant King Roderick I (Cecil Parker). The outlaws have the rightful heir to the throne in their possession – a baby boy bearing the hereditary birthmark of a purple pimpernel on its left buttock!

Aided by Maid Jean (the outlaw band's Maid Marian figure), Hawkins sets off to infiltrate Roberick's castle in the guise of Giacomo – "King of Jesters and Jester to the King" – an entertainer from the Italian Court.

The rest is blissful foolery.

Americans always claim to have no understanding of the British theatrical tradition of Pantomime, but this film is evidence to the contrary as some of its top-name players camp it up in a wonderfully silly romp with a score (by Sammy Cahn and Kaye's wife, Sylvia Fine) comprising a couple of ballads and a string of patter songs worthy of Messrs G&S.

There are also hilarious set-piece sequences of quick-fire, punning banter that must have been a nightmare to learn – let alone deliver with a straight face...

Probably the film's most famous sequence – at least its most quoted – is the one in which the hapless Hawkins is about to enter the lists opposite Sir Griswold (known as "the grim and grisly Griswold"), a man built like a brick out-house, in an attempt to win the hand of the Princess Gwendolen (Lansbury). Fortunately – perhaps – Gwen's witchy handmaid, Griselda, has spiked one of the pre-tournament toasting cups.

BUT –– which one has the pellet with the poison...?

One of the joys of the film is seeing Basil Rathbone, a superb swordsman who crossed blades with the best, spoofing his famous sword-fight with Errol Flynn in Robin Hood this time round with Hawkins who is currently under one of Griselda charms so that when anyone snaps their fingers he becomes – SNAP! – a brave as Douglas Fairbanks or – SNAP! – once again the inept buffoon he truly is...

Anyway, if you've never seen The Court Jester don't just take my word for it: get the DVD and see it for yourself. And if you have seen it then you'll now that, like an old friend, reunion is always pleasurable. So, why not watch it again? Go on – you know you want to!

So, what do you say...?

SHORT CARTOONS

2011-08-27T00:45:00.004+01:00

The fact that this is a spoof is as plain as the nose on Pinocchio's face.

Oh, I see......

These, on the other hand, are a genuine product: just £9.51 a pair!

Still, at least Messrs Milne and Shepard got a credit!

NOTHING TO BE DONE

2011-08-25T00:01:00.000+01:00

Yesterday's Plays
revised for
Today's Playgoers...

# 1:

waiting_4_go.com

Image: Waiting for Godot by Roger Cumminskey

THE ILLUSTRATED MIND

2011-08-22T00:01:00.008+01:00

Today my favourite author (and dear friend) RAY BRADBURY is 91 years young!

It is no exaggeration to say that the book on the left changed my life. I can still remember the day in the 'sixties when I saw it on a twirling rack of paperbacks outside the stationers shop in Chislehurst village – that's back in the days when local villages had stationers!

I had never heard the name Ray Bradbury, but I was excited by the cover: the title (although I didn't recognise it as a quotation); the startling combination of black, red and purple; the monstrous grotesques depicted (I didn't know then that they were by Goya and other dark visionaries); and the promise of what lay within its pages: Stories of weird, beautiful and wonderfully improbably people, places and things...

How could I resist? I read the book in a day and was overwhelmed! I had never read anything like it: the style, the ideas flooded my imagination...

Years later, I dramatised a story from this book for radio ('The Fruit at the Bottom of the Bowl') and I was reminded how much this book is part of my psyche when I was pulled up short in front of a display case in the current British Library exhibition Out of this World: Science Fiction but not as we know it by a copy of Collier's magazine (28 June, 1952) containing the first appearance of another of those golden apples, 'The Sound of Thunder', a fantastic tale combining time-travel and dinosaurs!

I looked at the powerful illustration by Frederick Siebel and was a kid again!

Back to my youthful discovery of of The Golden Apples of the Sun: the very next day I was hot-footing it to the library in search of more volumes bearing the open sesame name, Ray Bradbury...

I have written elsewhere (and those interested can follow some of the links at the end of this post) about how those books led, years later, to a correspondence and friendship that has continued to this day.

But, for now, to celebrate Ray's birthday, here are a couple of portraits of the man who hurled me into outer space with The Martian Chronicles; transported me back in time with a glass of Dandelion Wine; lifted the tent-flap of the dark carnival and told me Something Wicked This Way Comes and struck a match in the dark and warned me against the Fireman who burn books at Fahrenheit 451.

The first portrait was made back in 1963 by Ray's long-time illustrator (of, among other books, The Golden Apples) Joseph (Joe) Mugnaini

The second was created, forty-seven years later, in 2010 to mark Ray's 90th birthday by a huge Bradbury fan, Lou Romano, production design artist on the Pixar animated films Up, The Incredibles and Monsters Inc.

On his blog, Lou Romano explains the genesis of the piece and how he created it

As for the little doodle on the left, it is one I made many years ago to accompany an article I wrote about Ray for a magazine that I've forgotten and which is, anyway, probably now defunct!

If you've time for another coffee...

There's a terrific video portrait of Ray on the website of The National Endowment for the Arts.

My blog, The Works, has a prose portrait of him, The Bradbury Machine.

And you might enjoy seeing some of Ray's letters to me in last year's blog post, Ninety Years from Mars.

Oh, yes, and there's more Bradbury stuff over on my Ex Libris blog.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RAY!

"Remember this: Love is at the centre of your life.
The things that you do should be things that you love
and things that you love should be things that you do."

TITUS FUGIT

2011-08-20T11:17:00.004+01:00

Time is running out! According to the BBC iPlayer, all six episodes of The History of Titus Groan (see last post below) will vanish from the audio bookshelf at 4:02PM Sun, 21 Aug 2011. Why wait that long?!

THE END OF HISTORY

2011-08-19T00:01:00.011+01:00

With the repeat of 'Titus Alive', the final episode of my radio Classic Serial, The History of Titus Groan tomorrow, Saturday (BBC Radio 4 at 21:00) my most ambitious project for very many years will come to an end.

If you have missed any or all of this cycle of plays based on the books by Mervyn Peake and featuring a cast headed by David Warner, Luke Treadaway, Miranda Richardson, James Fleet and Carl Prekopp, you've still got a day in which to catch up on any or all of the six episodes on the BBC iPlayer.

It's been a week of mixed fortunes as two national radio critics passed judgment on the series. First was Gillian Reynolds in The Daily Telegraph.

Back in 2004, reviewing my serialisation of The Pilgrim's Progress, Ms Reynolds had written: "Sibley dramatised The Lord of the Rings, did excellent versions of C S Lewis's Narnia stories, got Mervyn Peake's Gormenghast better than BBC TV (and for two ounces of that other version's megaton budget), and all for Radio 4..."

Now, however, she wrote:

Titus Groan, the first Radio 4 Classic Serial in ages to be given six parts, ended on Sunday. I have listened to every episode, admiring the acting, Brian Sibley’s adaptation of a complex work, the pace of Jeremy Mortimer’s direction. I still couldn’t understand what was going on. At all. The minute I thought I had, off it would go again into another dimension of fear, temptation, betrayal, each so vivid it flooded the mind’s eye, all adding into a dream I didn’t want to enter. If anyone can offer me the key into this version, pray tell. Just don’t say “the book”. If the book is the key, what’s the point of a radio version?

Hmmmm...

Well, yes, I admit I was momentarily cast down, but then came along the wonderful Elisabeth Mahoney in The Guardian and gave me one of the most fantastic reviews I have ever received:

In 1985, Brian Sibley adapted Mervyn Peake's Titus Groan and Gormenghast for Radio 4. I had only recently discovered both Peake and Radio 4, but I wasn't sure I wanted them to meet. Peake's extraordinary writing it felt to me then, was all about a solitary, personal flight of imagination where the reader makes the pictures to match the soaring, peculiar prose. Someone else's version would surely feel like an intrusion.
In fact, it was brilliant, so much so that I quite got the jitters on hearing that Sibley was tackling Peake again. Instead of worrying about my images while reading Peake being replaced by radio ones, I was concerned about the two radio ones competing. And it was a hugely ambitious project: Peake's three novels plus the concluding volume by Peake's wife, Maeve Gilmore, rediscovered last year, made into six hours of Classic Serial.
The terrific new adaptation ended at the weekend (but the whole series can be heard online until Saturday), and shows just what radio drama can do in the right hands. It captured every brilliant thing about Peake: the glorious writing; the strangeness; the collision of voices and realities; the satire of now – whenever now is as you read or listen – and the beautiful, vivid conjuring of fragments of the past.
And actually, it added to the brilliance, which in Peake's case takes some doing. Roger Goula's music and Peter Ringrose's sound production are outstanding, as memorable and transporting as the exquisite words. Luke Treadaway, as Titus, has the exact voice Titus always had as I read, while David Warner as The Artist has just the right weary omnipotence yet glittering turn of phrase, drawing you into scenes; very movingly indeed in the last moments with Titus.
I listened to these alongside whatever each weekend presented (lashing rain, allotment duties, coastal walk) and they were a huge treat. With really good writing, and an exceptional adaptation such as this, it does rather occlude everything else.

I smiled and, in dark realm of Gormenghast – unlikely as it may seem – the sun came out, birds sang, little children laughed and flowers blossomed!

Time is also running out to catch the last in the current series of Quote... Unquote... in which Nigel Rees puts questions on quotations to Shealagh Fogarty, Ardel O'Hanlon, Martin Jarvis and Moi! There's two days left to listin in on BBC iPlayer.

Images: The Estate of Mervyn Peake

ROYAL RESULT

2011-08-16T18:50:00.003+01:00

CAPTION COMPETITION
THE RESULTS!

A right regal turn-out of caption entries resulted from the photo (left) of Her Maj turning up at Eton at tea-time.

HM having declined to judge the entries, we turned (not for the first time) to Ms Polkadots & Moonbeams who undertook the task of assessing the (uncredited) submissions with all due seriousness and an appropriate (i.e. essential) quantity of vino.

First, however, I would like to share with you the Editor's Picks, four honourable mentions for personally tweaking my aging funny-bone...

Sharon M:

"My husband and I were just saying, 'here today, scone tomorrow'"

Andy J Latham:

"THAT's how it's pronounced?!"

Good Dog:

"Ew, look, one has two!"

And Michael G:

"Damn, I've just been given a wedgie!"

Now, to the RUNNERS UP...

Anonymous:

"If I'd known there'd be free grub, I could've saved 20p on me cornflakes!"

Boll Weavil:

"Ma'am, I'm sorry if you thought a pair of lovely buns was a cue for another Sibley Caption Competition with men in underpants !"
[This was Highly Commended by the Judge for "Sibley-blog-awareness"!]

"Straight from Swelter's School Dinners Recipe Book Ma'am."

"Sorry about the racket Ma'am. Another Brian May on the roof!"

David Weeks:

"That jam's not from Fortnums!"

"Margerine?!"

"One has just finished one's lunch, it can't be time for tea, yet!"

"'We invite you to see us crowned at Scone,' is how the play ends... Not with scones!"

Sharon M:

"Who served them before the Sovereign? Off with their heads!"

"One isn't Rupert Murdoch, you know!"

A Snow White Sanctum:

"Egads, man! Something's still alive in there!"

Suzanne:

"What? Philip made those?"

And so to the–– WINNERS!

THIRD PLACE

ROGER:

"No, No, No, jam first then the cream! Chavs get everywhere nowadays!"

SECOND PLACE

DAVID WEEKS:

"Scones, on plastic plates?!"

FIRST PLACE

BOLL WEAVIL:

"Yes, Ma'am, I'm afraid the cooking has all gone downhill since Steerpike left the kitchen."

Many congratulations to the winners and thanks to everyone who entered!

FULLY AWAKE

2011-08-14T00:01:00.004+01:00

A copy of the American copy of Maeve Gilmore's Titus Awakes arrives in time for the final episode of The History of Titus Groan (Radio 4, today at 15:00) which brings to a resolution the the double-narrator device that I used in the series and which was inspired by a highly personal episode in Maeve's book.

How and why did it happen that American publishers still manage to market elegantly produced books while, by comparison, their British counterparts look cheap and tawdry?

In the UK you can only get Titus Awakes as a dull-looking paperback; American readers have a hardback printed on quality paper with untrimmed page-edges and a dramatic Peake-illustrated dust-jacket...

Oh, yes, and I get my name on the cover, too!

Anyway back to the radio series: we have been wonderfully feted by the press including the Radio Times which, in its current issue, lists the concluding installment of the serial both in its PICK OF THE WEEK round-up at the front of the magazine and in the MISSED IT? section at the back ("Catch up on the best of recent TV & radio") where it is described as a RADIO GEM:

A triumphant sprawl of a dramatisation , celebrating 100 years since the birth of acute English fantasy novelist Mervyn Peake... Lavishly mounted and delivered with relish by a fine, fine cast including David Warner, Tamsin Greig, Miranda Richardson and Luke Treadaway, the series is available in full on iPlayer, ready to be binged on.

And, finally on this self-aggrandising topic, when you hear a poor unfortunate soul being subjected to some fiendish experiment in the Scientist's 'factory', the agonized scream you hear is a chilling Hitchcockian cameo by Yourstruly – and to prove it, here I am mid-scream...

Photo: Islay Bell-Webb

HISTORY FINALS

2011-08-13T00:01:00.004+01:00

If you missed, 'Titus Abroad', the fifth part of my play cycle, The History of Titus Groan, based on the novels of Mervyn Peake, you can catch it tonight on BBC Radio 4 at 21:00.

And you can hear Part 6, 'Titus Alive', also on Radio 4, tomorrow, Sunday 14 August, at 15:00.

In the sixth and final play, Titus is entranced by the beautiful but manipulative Cheeta, played by Morvern Christie..

Falling foul of her machinations, he finds himself – can it possibly be? – back in Gormenghast...

My Titus play cycle concludes with episodes drawn from Titus Awakes, a fourth 'Gormenghast' novel written by Mervyn Peake's widow, the late Maeve Gilmore, and recently published with an introduction by myself. In this new material, Titus encounters an Artist (David Warner) and discovers his destiny...

All of the episodes, as they are broadcast, will remain accessible via the BBC iPlayer until the series is complete. Then, eight days later, it will be possible to download and purchase all six hours of drama to relive at your leisure.

And (if you're not Sibleyed-out) you can stay tuned to BBC Radio 4 for the repeat of my second appearance on Nigel Ree's much-loved panel-game, Quote... Unquote... at 23:00.

Photos: Islay Bell-Webb

ROYAL REMINDER

2011-08-11T11:25:00.007+01:00

The closing date for entries for the current

CAPTION COMPETITION
is fast approaching!

Please tell me (via comments, below), not later than midnight GMT tomorrow, what Her Maj is saying or thinking on being accosted by a phalanx of young Etonians proffering scones!

WEIGHTING AROUND

2011-08-10T00:01:00.004+01:00

When you think of the Canadian city of Calgary, you probably think of the Calgary Stampede and cowboys on galloping horses rounding up cattle.

What you are probably unlikely to think of is hippopotami...

But, as Sheila and Roger discovered on their recent travels, each of the luggage carousels at Calgary Airport features a different animal and, in the vicinity of Oversize Baggage, you will find a hippopotamus who seems to be saying, "Guess where your missing suitcase is?"

Anyway, I am reminded that Mitch Hedberg once astutely asked: "Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?"

Photo: Sheila Shrigley © 2011

DON'T QUOTE ME

2011-08-08T00:01:00.006+01:00

You may recall that I was foolhardy enough to display my Ignorance Quotient by taking part in Quote... Unquote... the warhorse of panel games devoted to the quoted and misquoted words of the famous and infamous. Well, today is my second appearance.

Here's pretty much the same picture of the talent line-up as I posted last time but with one difference...

Left to right: actor and comedian, Ardal O'Hanlon; the show's creator and chairman, Nigel Rees; broadcaster, Shelagh Fogarty; Yours Truly; the new addition – Quotes Reader and Announcer (and one of the veteran voices of the BBC) Peter Jefferson; and actor, Martin Jarvis.

You can hear how we all got on and catch some of our favourite quotes and anecdotes by tuning
in to BBC Radio 4 at 13:30 today.

The show will be repeated on Radio 4 next Saturday evening at 23:00 and, thereafter, can be listened to via BBC iPlayer for the following seven days. And don't take any notice of the fact that the people at iPlayer have chosen to drop my name from the list of performers – they will regret it when they get my solicitor's letter!

If you'd like to know more about the show (and the whole quoting game) visit the official website: Quote... Unquote...

COMING FIFTH IN HISTORY

2011-08-06T00:01:00.006+01:00

If you missed, 'Titus Departs', the fourth part of my play cycle, The History of Titus Groan, based on the novels of Mervyn Peake, you can catch it tonight on BBC Radio 4 at 21:00.

And you can hear Part 5, 'Titus Abroad', also on Radio 4, tomorrow, Sunday 7 August, at 15:00.

Having deserted his ancestral home, Titus finds himself in an alien world with many enemies, but fortunately a couple of caring friends: the eccentric Muzzlehatch and loving Juno, played by Gerard Murphy and Maureen Beattie...

It was an unexpected delight to work with Gerard who thirty years ago this year (in what was his first ever radio role and in the very same BBC studio) narrated my dramatisation of The Lord of the Rings!

You can read my thoughts on the challenge of taking Titus out of the crumbling confines of Gormenghast into the wider world on the BBC Radio 4 blog.

All of the episodes, as they are broadcast, will remain accessible via the BBC iPlayer until the series is complete. Then, eight days later, it will be possible to download and purchase all six hours of drama.

Photo: Islay Bell-Webb

MAN OF MAGIC

2011-08-05T10:13:00.008+01:00

BIRTHDAY GREETINGS

to
Master Magician, Illusionist, Actor, Showman, Yachtsman, Pilot, Death-defying Stunt Artist...

JOHN CALVERT

100
years old today

still performing magic and booked to appear at the London Palladium in September!

ROYAL REACTION

2011-08-04T00:01:00.001+01:00

CAPTION COMPETITION TIME!

It was clearly an alarming moment for Her Majesty when she encountered scone-bearing Etonians...

What was she thinking or saying? Let me know...

Answers via 'comments' below. Closing date for submissions Friday 12 August.

WHO ART

2011-08-01T16:00:00.006+01:00

As every telly-addict knows, 23 November 1963, saw the first recorded visit to earth of a Time and Relative Dimension in Space (Tardis) cunningly disguised as a Police Box, when the iconic TV series, Doctor Who debuted on the BBC.

Almost a year after Doctor Who premiered, the Time Lord began a parallel series of adventures in the pages of TV Comic and he has continued to appear in comics for every one of the successive 47 years, gaining his own title in 1979 with Doctor Who Weekly, and is still going strong today in Doctor Who Magazine.

The rich heritage of British comic-book art represented in the pages of these various publications (as well as books and annuals) are currently being celebrated at London's Cartoon Museum in an exhibition DOCTOR WHO in COMICS: 1964-2011 which features art by a pantheon of British comic greats including Frank Bellamy, Martin Geraghty, Dave Gibbons, Dave Lloyd, John Ridgway, Andrew Skilleter and Lee Sullivan who specially created this piece – 'The Usual Suspects' – for the exhibition...

There are some fascinating time-travelling anomalies like the fact that during the wilderness years when BBC TV was 'Who-less', his comic personae (multiple Doctor stories were not uncommon) were still enjoying all manner of exploits often in the company of characters from the series like Sarah Jane-Smith, the Brigadier and K-9 as well as exclusively comic-book compatriots such as his first black companion, Sharon, created in pen-and-ink twenty-five years before the flesh-and-blood Mickey or Martha Jones joined the Doctor on screen.

There there are the ever-present, ever-menacing enemies: The Master, the Cybermen, Davros and, of course ("EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!"), the Daleks...

From Dalek Omnibus, 1976, Artist unknown

Clearly, this is an exhibition aimed at the Doctror's legions of faithful followers, but anyone with an interest in half-a-century of British graphic art will not want to miss this truly fabulous collection of over one hundred pieces of classic Who-art of which these are just a few examples...

TV Action and Countdown, 28 October 1972
by Dennis Hooper

Promotional image for Doctor Who and the Genesis of the Daleks
1975, Artist unknown

'City of the Damned' by Dave Gibbons
Doctor Who Weekly, 12 December1979

'Tides of Time' (detail) by Dave Gibbons
Doctor Who Monthly, 1982

'Voyager' (detail) by John Ridgway
Doctor Who Magazine, 1994

'The Crimson Hand' (detail) by Martin Geraghty, David Roach, James Offredi
Doctor Who Magazine, 2010

The Brilliant Book of Doctor Who 2011, Martin Geraghty

The exhibition DOCTOR WHO in COMICS: 1964-2011 remains on show until 30 October

The Cartoon Museum, 35 Little Russell Street, London WC1A 2HH

Telephone: 0207 580 8155
Email: info@cartoonmuseum.org
Check at www.cartoonmuseum.org for details of special events

OPENING TIMES:
Tuesday-Saturday: 10:30–17:3; Sunday: 12.00–17:30
(Closed on Mondays including Bank Holiday Mondays)

ADMISSION
£5.50 Adults; £4 Concessions; £3 Students with valid student ID
Free to Under-18s, Art Fund Members and Friends of the Cartoon Museum
Children 12 or under must be accompanied by an adult

Images: © BBC © Doctor Who Magazine.Panini UK

Click on the 'Dr Who' tag below for previous Who postings on this blog

HISTORICAL PERSPECTIVE

2011-07-30T00:01:00.018+01:00

If you missed, 'Titus Discovers', the third part of my play cycle, The History of Titus Groan, based on the novels of Mervyn Peake, you can catch it tonight on BBC Radio 4 at 21:00.

And you can hear Part 4, 'Titus Departs', also on Radio 4, tomorrow, Sunday 31 July, at 15:00, described in the latest issue of Radio Times as: "An absolute triumph."

Here's another snap from the recording session with Luke Treadaway and Hugo Docking (left and right as grown up and young Titus) and David Warner who plays the Artist.

Instead of saying "Cheese!", the photographer asked us to say "Gormenghast!" which explains why three of us have rather strange expressions. Luke, however, was too smart to get caught like that!

Among the events that are chronicled in the fourth play tomorrow are the developments in the brother sister relationships between Titus and Fuchsia played by Olivia Hallinan...

There is also a growing awareness of Steerpike's perfidy by Titus' mother, the Countess Gertrude, and Doctor Alfred Prunesquallor, played by Miranda Richardson and James Fleet...

And, lightening the mood, there are the comic events surrounding the courtship and marriage of Miss Irma Prunesquallor and Professor Bellgrove, played by Tamsin Greig and William Gaunt...

SNOW IN JULY

2011-07-28T00:01:00.004+01:00

Several years ago now, I posted on the subject of clowns and the not-entirely-irrational fear that they engender in some people.

Among those of the clowning profession whom I mentioned was the Russian genius, Vyacheslav Ivanovich Polunin or Slava (left), whose wonderfully bizarre, infinitely heartwarming entertainment, Slava's Snowshow will be touring the UK this autumn and returning to London in December.

Simon Callow, never an actor given to underemphasis, described Snow show as "The single most beautiful thing I have ever seen in a theatre in my life", and I couldn't agree more.

David and I saw Slava at the Old Vic many years go and it has remained with us both as one of the most astonishing, funny and moving experiences we have ever enjoyed.

Here's a film of part of Slava's Snowshow that captures something of what it was like to be in audience: but without the full shiver-making frisson as the furious tempo of Carl Orff's 'O Fortuna' from Carmina Burana mounts to its scorching crescendo as you are literally dazzled and blasted by a blinding blizzard of brilliant cold whiteness.

If you catch even a hint of Slava's magic here – go and see the real thing!

QUOTE UNQUOTED

2011-07-26T00:01:00.008+01:00

During the edition of Quote... Unquote... on which I appeared last week, I quoted Robert Benchley's famous quip on Venice, and then went on to read a short, but highly evocative, passage from what is probably my favourite book written about the city: Watermark by Joseph Brodsky.

Sadly, it got edited out of the programme (though not too surprisingly since they recorded almost fifty minutes for what was, ultimately, only a half-hour show), so I thought I'd share it with you here.

A Russian-American poet and essayist, Joseph Brodsky (1940-1996) was expelled from the Soviet Union in 1972 for alleged "social parasitism".

With the help of W H Auden and others, he settled in the USA, taught at Yale and other universities, was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1987 "for an all-embracing authorship, imbued with clarity and poetic intensity", and was made American Poet Laureate in 1991.

Watermark is a long, discursive, essay, that describes the author's feelings about Venice. It would prove little or no use to those one-day tourists who throng the city, because it doesn't tell you even a fraction of what you need to know in order to point your camera in the right direction!

It is about the ideas and the emotions that Venice can arouse in the visitor with the temperament (and time) to watch and listen. It is also, and this is its quiet genius, about how the city shows the writer to himself.

This passage is from a section of the book that especially pleases me because most of our Venetian pilgrimages have been made in wintertime and because, like Brodsky, I am forced to greet each day with a heaped handful of pills!

In winter you wake up in this city, especially on Sundays, to the chiming of its innumerable bells, as though behind your gauze curtains a gigantic china tea-set were vibrating on a silver tray in the pearl-grey sky.

You fling the window open and the room is instantly flooded with this outer, peal-laden haze, which is part damp oxygen, part coffee and prayers.

No matter what sort of pills, and how many, you've got to swallow this morning, you feel it's not over for you yet.

Superb!

On Quote... Unquote... I didn't go on to quote (but I can do so here!) a line by Brodsky that, when I read it, summed up – in one sentence – my own feelings about La Serenissima...

Because one is finite, a departure from this place always feels final: leaving it behind is leaving it forever.

Brodksy himself never left Venice 'forever': he rests at peace on the cemetery island of San Michele. Venice-lovers unlikely to be accorded a similar privilege can, instead, comfort themselves by reading Watermark

Image: 'Dawn on the Piazetta San Marco' by Brian Sibley, © 2000.
There are more of our photos of this wondrous city in our flickr collection Visions of Venice