Thursday, 12 February 2009

LITERARY GAMES

From the ever-entertaining (and thoroughly non-PC) Engrish.com...


Including, one guesses, such books as Hobbit Hurdling, Middle-earth Marathon-running, Horse-riding in Rohan and Elvish Rules of Archery but, needless to say, nothing on Dwarf-tossing since, as Gimli made clear in The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, "Nobody tosses a Dwarf!"

7 comments:

Suzanne said...

you forgot stone throwing Brian - everyone knows Hobbits are world champions!
mingstr: a very rare phenomenon that occurs when Middle Earth and the real world collide

LisaH said...

To say nothing of Hobbit soccer - in which ear-pulling and foot stamping is allowed.

I thought Aragorn tossed Gimli, who said "Don't tell the Elf" - or was that just in the film?

Brian Sibley said...

SUZANNE - So they are! I forgot... Loved 'mingstr'!

LISAH - In the first film (Fellowship) Aragorn wants to toss Gimli across the gap in the staircase after the fall of the Bridge of Khazad-dum (one of Mr Jackson's many inventions) but Gimli says, "Nobody tosses a Dwarf!" and makes the jump himself. In the second film (Two Towers) Aragorn tosses Gimli onto the approach to Helm's Deep (another PJ embellishment) and that's when he says "Don't tell the Elf!"

Needless to say, Professor Tolkien makes NO reference to Dwarf-tossing...

Suzanne said...

and if anybody has any more questions about dwarf-tossing... see the extended versions of the DVD's - it's all explained in there!
ditonc: a very rare sport involving elf-tossing

luinfalathiel said...

I am a HUGE fan of http://engrish.com ... they had a great pic of Aragorn on a huge banner that said "the Clean and Safe Campaign" a while ago. No idea what it was for.

niallin - an Elven painkiller administered after tossing Dwarfs.

Boll Weavil said...

I presumed that Gimli's comments were written for 'adult' laughs as the times I saw Fellowship at the cinema, it always got a great roar of laughter !
Thofan: One who lives primarily in Middle Earth or Narnia and just pops back to reality periodically to make a bit of cash and because his house is there.


My name is Boll and I am a Thofan...

Brian Sibley said...

LUINFALATHIEL - 'Niallin' - brilliant! I can see the ad campaign now. "Eight out of ten Dwarves use Niallin for post-tossing tension..."

BOLL - The thing is there really is a sport of Dwarf-tossing as you can see.