BREAKFAST BRIEFING

 

My first real outing – and with an out-door lunch – since my discharge from hospital on New Year's Eve: Espresso Eggs Benedict with extra bacon at Flotsam & Jetsam, Dulwich Art Gallery...

 

FULL OF BEANZ!

Ah, time for lunch! 

Beans on toast? 

NO!

Heinz Beanz Cheesy on toast...

It looked and sounded interesting – even a little tantalizing – so we gave it a go...

VERDICT:  

OK... We like both named ingredients, so, yes, OK. But seriously over-priced (£1.50-£1.80, depending on the store) and, yes, you could certainly make it more cheaply yourself.

WARNING!: 

Be aware there are some extremely negative reviews of this product online. For example, one Tesco customer wrote: "Tastes and smells like burnt cheese on toast mixed in with a teenager's gym sock."

THERE'S MORE!: 

What I didn't know (I lead such a sheltered life) is that 'Beanz Cheesy' (or should that be 'Cheezy'?) is just the tip of the iceberg – sorry, that's a ludicrous simile – the tip of 'a hill of beans', because Heinz have, apparently, been messing about with their legendary product for some while now... 

 

OH, AND, YES, TALKING OF SOCKS (see above): 

It turns out that Heinz really DO sell socks...  

Sorry, SOCKZ!!

NO!

ENOUGH!

PULL YOUR FINGER OUT!

Hearing a description of someone on the radio the other day as having "A finger in every pie", made me think that this would make an excellent advertising slogan for that legendary pie-maker, Mrs. Nellie Lovett, so I made this little mock-up for her...

 

 I was thinking of adding:

"Since eating one of Mrs. Lovett's pies, I have eaten no other!" 

– His Hon. Judge Turpin (Decd.)

HOMEWARD BOUND

Time to go...

The condemned man ate a hearty breakfast...

FOREIGN FOOD

One of the joys of foreign travel: the chance to taste dishes authentic to the region...

...in the case a breakfast cereal you won't find in your local UK supermarket.

But 'why?' you can't help wondering: did they do some selective consumer research and discover that the Brits just weren't up to dark chocolate on their corn flakes...?

VEGETABLE OPTION

The absolutely ONLY way in which to eat that otherwise most unpleasant vegetable, the aubergine: slice it, batter it, deep fry it and serve it with Kalymnian honey and cinnamon. Perfect!

FOOD FOR REMEMBRANCE

This is Koliva, a special Greek Orthodox food made to commemorate the souls of the departed...

It contains wheat or barley (the seed which is buried in the ground brings for the new life), thrice cleaned, steeped in hot water and then dried on cloths before being mixed with sesame seeds (toasted and ground), cinnamon, nutmeg, honey and, sometimes, pomegranate seeds. The finished dish is then blessed by a priest at a Mass at which the living remember and pray for their loved ones and all souls who have died in faith of the church as part of a tradition dating back to the 12th Century.

The recipe actually predates even Christianity to the ancient Greek culture with particular reference to the Pantheon of deities: the barley or wheat representing Demeter the earth goddess, pomegranate signifying her daughter, Persephone, the queen of the underworld and, when other almonds and raisins were added, Aphrodite and Dionysus to whom those nuts and fruit were sacred.

It was a privilege to be able to share in a moment of Greek (and Eastern Orthodox) culture that is both truly historic and full of spiritual symbolism – especially as tomorrow marks the 15th anniversary of my own mother's death...

You can read all about Koliva here.

Photos © Brian Sibley and David Weeks

SANDWICHED IN

Now THIS is what I call a sandwich...

...or, as the Italians call it, a tramezzino.

Constructed from very soft bread minus the crusts, tramazini are capable of holding generously-portioned fillings of prosciutto, cheese, tuna and olive or, in the one sampled above, egg and crab.

Tramezzino are said to have been invented in 1925 at the Caffè Mulassano di Piazza Castello in Turin as an alternative to English-style sandwiches. Today, apparently, the bar offers forty varieties of tramezzini. Here, in Venice, and all over Italy, these inexpensive and deliciously satisfying snacks are available in bars to busy Italians (and scurrying tourists) as an accompaniment to a swift espresso or a more leisurely Aperol Spritzer.

The word tramezzino was invented by Gabriele D'Annunzio as a substitute for the English word "sandwich", being easier (for Italians) to pronounce and – whilst a neologism – it is  a completely Italian term since "tramezzino" sounds like "in-between", with the addition of the diminutive suffix  "-ino".

Diminutive they may be, but as my old gran used to say: "Good things come in small packages!"

Of course, if you want to eat tramazzini at Gran Caffe Quadri in Piazetta San Marco you will pay twice as much (at least) for the privilege of having half the stuffing –– depending on your definition of being 'stuffed'!! 

 

TASTY PICTURES

Readers of this blog will know that I am a lover of photography and, among the many specialist exponents of that art, I have particular admiration for those who photograph food for cookbooks and cuisine journalism.

Romas Foord (left) is the stepson of a friend at The Magic Circle and his own unique camera magic has recently won him two major accolades as one of the winners of Books, Broadcast and Journalism Awards given by The James Beard Foundation and the Fortnum & Mason Food and Drink Award for 'Visual Work of the Year'. The book that contains this award-winning photography is Historic Heston, in which Heston Blumenthal takes a journey through several centuries of British food.

Romas Foord's photographs are exquisitely composed, stunningly lit and, as a result, are achingly beautiful, evoking the feeling of 17th Century still life paintings of the Dutch Masters.

Look and marvel...

Glorious aren't they?

Romas Foord has a wide variety of photographic styles in his portfolio - here are a few examples...

...Now go and visit his website and enjoy more delicious images!

BUON ANNO!

HAPPY NEW YEAR

2014

VENETIAN TREATS

Today, we are back in our favourite city, Venice, for the first time in two years! Here are few of the Christmas delights awaiting us. Jane Asher and Mary Berry eat your hearts out!

HOLIDAY TREATS

As a kid I was notoriously picky about breakfast cereals (an odd hang-up I admit) and my Mum despaired of finding one that I liked. Then, on a holiday trip to an aunt and uncle in Somerset, I fell in love with Weetabix (a previously rejected brand) and not only ate what I was given but, Oliver Twist-like, asked for more!

Back home, my delighted mother immediately invested in a bargain-bumper-mega-giant-economy-size box of Weetablix and, as might have been predicted, never touched them again –– at least, not for many years!

I have a theory that there's a whole category of food and drink that we enjoy – indeed, relish – while being on holiday but which has little or no appeal if once transported to, or encountered in, the normal mundane surroundings of our home environment: hence the number of unopened bottles of Ouzo currently stashed under our stairs!

Among such exclusive vacation treats I'd list waffles with maple syrup and crispy bacon in an American diner, soft ice cream with a Cadbury's flake on a British seaside pier –– and a ice-cool, foamy freddo cappuccino in a shady Greek taverna...

Still, like all the very best treats, it was fun while it lasted!

PICK OF THE PIX: SALAD

Simplicity...

A TASTE OF SUMMER...

...even if we don't actually have a summer!!

WHO KNEW IT?

An amoosing revelation from the Dairy Department: gay cows!

FRESH 'N' WILD

This is, without question, the freshest salad I've ever been served!


Photo: David Weeks

EGGSCESSIVENESS!

A seasonal offering from Zoeycakes ('little cakes. big taste'): take one Cadbury's creme egg and bake inside a chocolate cupcake, top off with vanilla butter-cream and a Cadbury's mini-egg...

Serve, eat and...

...prepare to be very ill!

Incidentally, as in the photo above, why does a cupcake (or a muffin) always look so much less attractive when its paper case has been peeled off? Rather like a stripper that doesn't quite have the body imagination had led one to expect...

You can find more photos of heart attacks on Zoeycakes flickr photostream and on their www.zoeycakes.com.

WHEN'S A HOT CROSS BUN NOT A BUN?

When it's a loaf!

To my mind (and I'm someone one for whom one HCB is never enough!) this ingenious offering from Asda seemed a bit extreme, but apparently not...

Last April, bakers at Hovis created – or, perhaps, built would be a better word – an HCB that was 9 foot by 5 foot: a total area of 45 square feet or the equivalent of 2,000 regular buns!

The ingredients? "48 kg of British Wheat flour, 4 kg mixed fruit, 68 whole eggs, 6 kg sugar, 6 kg butter; plus litres of milk & water and mixed spice." But how many litres and how much mixed spice? Vital information missing there for all budding home bakers, I fear!

Anyway, here's what it (or part of it) looked like...


You can read the whole(meal) story, along with some interesting facts about the history of the HCB, here.

BANGERED TO RIGHTS

A friend in The Magic Circle e-mailed me recently, saying: "Put me out of my misery! Is that you on the sausage stall in the Churchill [car insurance] advert where he takes part in a tug-o-war? It certainly looks like you!"

You can see the commercial in question on YouTube and here's a screen-grab of the guy on the sausage stall...


So, what do you think? Is that just a Sibley look-alike? Or is it actually me doing a bit of sneaky cookery practice for Come Dine with Me?

COOKING THE BOOKS

Of course I'm not going to take part in Come Dine With Me, but - just supposing - I were, what would I serve?

The obvious answer has been provided by Roger and Sheila (many thanks) in the form of a copy of Roald Dahl's Revolting Recipes inspired by various odious episodes from Dahl's vivid (and often lurid) imagination and depicted, of course, by Quentin Blake

Among possible dishes that I might have tackled (if I were going on the show, which, of course, I'm not!) are Snozzcumbers (cucumbers stuffed with tuna and poppy seeds), Stink Bugs' Eggs (hard boiled eggs with the yolks mixed with cheese, curry powder and chopped gherkins sprinkled with Asafoetida, an Indian herb that, apparently, smells of sweaty socks) and Crispy Wasp Stings, Wormy Spaghetti, Hot Frogs (served on a pool of green custard) and Mosquitoes' Toes and Wampfish Roes Most Delicately Fried which - because it's more fun - I'll leave you to imagine for yourselves.

The book is full of recipes on which children, in our obsessive age of health and safety, probably ought not to be let lose! For example, there are instructions for making Candy-Coated Pencils for Sucking in Class without any warnings to stop sucking when you get down to the paint and lead! And as for the Enormous [Savory] Crocodile...


...that uses a baguette and a wire coat-hanger (without its hook) to keep the 'jaws' open!

Suitable beverages include Frobscottle - liquidised kiwis and limes, drinking yogurt, lemonade, cream soda and a Redoxon tablet added just before drinking. This would be perfect for a Come Dine with Dahl experience, following which guests could settle down to a hilarious whizzpopping contest!!

Is to late, I wonder...?

Messrs Dahl & Blake (by Blake)
enjoying frobscottle and snozcumbers